Doctor appt today, and he happily wrote up all the pain relief I needed prescribed for my shoulder.
I thought it might be difficult to get him to prescribe endone, panadeine forte, mobic, panadol osteo, and palexia.. but we went over how I was taking them all and he agreed that I was fine with how I was approaching it - and that taking such a variety of things meant actually taking less opioid based meds because I was able to keep on top of the pain with things like panadol osteo.
We also did my mental health plan and I hit a 40 on the K10.. which is Very Fucking High. We talked about that, and about how therapy is helping and that a big part of the 40 score is probably actually pain related as well.
He agreed that I showed great insight into my illness and that I was comfortable with being vulnerable enough to ask for help, so I get to skip hospitalisation (fucking yay!) because I have a good support system and I know how to access acute assistance if needed.
But still, 40 was even higher than I was expecting tbh. I'm usually around a 25-27.
I've started a new Fetlife group for disabled people. It was started after it became apparent that the other group was going to allow chasers to fetishise and objectify disabled people and that the group wasn't safe for us.
Prof. Yair Bar Haim, professor of Psychology and Neuroscience and director, the National Center for Traumatic Stress and Resilience, discusses the current situation in Israel. Specifically, what work psychologists perform on the ground while we are at war with Hamas.
He also provides guidance for those in the diaspora about dealing with the associated trauma of what is occurring in Israel.
There are just some mornings where I wake up and it feels like my brain and body are ringing the alarm bells that something is terribly wrong but I can't puzzle out why I'm overcome with panic and dread.
Finishing up The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma this week. I started this in July and set it down when we got back home from the cabin. I think it's time I get back to it.
@housepanther@obrerx@actuallyautistic I’m on some very good meds already that keep me perfectly fine. I worked through a lot of it on my own. Lots of positive self-talk and reminding myself I’m safe now.
@housepanther@obrerx@actuallyautistic Luckily my brain erased most of it. There are/were people in my life who remember all of it, but as soon as they realized I have no memory of the events, they said it’s better that I don’t know so they stopped telling me things and talking about it. The stuff they told me I was horrified, but my brain was like nope going to erase this too. No idea what they said but I vaguely remember the shock and horror I felt.
@actuallyautistic @audhd @adhd #Ptsd and #autism / #adhd
Often getting mixed up, indiscernible sometimes even to ourselves.
I don't believe that we are any less resilient compared to NT. I believe that we have to deal with two things, not one, without the support that NTpeople may feel.
I believe we have to get to the bottom of the things that trouble us, in order to feel healed. We feel compelled to be creating a maelstrom in our mindbodyconciousness, that draws in every part of the world we know, everything we are, until we have everything questioned, taken apart, because we feel that everything is affected, everything must change in order to heal the wound of whatever trauma we may have experienced. That's a lot of work. We tend to be bad at containing it, leaving all the other aspects of out life's experience where they are. I believe it's related to sensitivity and hyperconnected brain. And to the outsider view of ND people.
If I hold in one hand the effort of what we are trying to do, in order to heal , and in the other the symptoms of suffering and stress that we display, I believe they are evenly matched. Not every NT will see this picture and we may have trouble understanding ourselves . We may find it hard to create the necessary self- love without this understanding being reflected onto us.
I am actually finding us to be remarkably resilient. Going and going, until we have digested all of that huge vortex, changed our whole consciousness and created a whole different reality.👍 :bd243: