Doctor appt today, and he happily wrote up all the pain relief I needed prescribed for my shoulder.
I thought it might be difficult to get him to prescribe endone, panadeine forte, mobic, panadol osteo, and palexia.. but we went over how I was taking them all and he agreed that I was fine with how I was approaching it - and that taking such a variety of things meant actually taking less opioid based meds because I was able to keep on top of the pain with things like panadol osteo.
We also did my mental health plan and I hit a 40 on the K10.. which is Very Fucking High. We talked about that, and about how therapy is helping and that a big part of the 40 score is probably actually pain related as well.
He agreed that I showed great insight into my illness and that I was comfortable with being vulnerable enough to ask for help, so I get to skip hospitalisation (fucking yay!) because I have a good support system and I know how to access acute assistance if needed.
But still, 40 was even higher than I was expecting tbh. I'm usually around a 25-27.
I've started a new Fetlife group for disabled people. It was started after it became apparent that the other group was going to allow chasers to fetishise and objectify disabled people and that the group wasn't safe for us.
I went to my first #cybersecurity conference this weekend and despite having mild #agoraphobia,
I actually felt super comfortable. What an amazing industry community that I'm looking forward to engaging with more.
I needed to allow myself to go without the pressure of networking or talking to people in order to take that first step. And I see now that without talking to people, you're only getting 1/10 of what makes a conference interesting.
But that's OK! I needed to just be in the room with people and recognize that I can do that without panicking. And my communication skills are real and don't disappear just because it's new people.
I only made it through half the conference, but I'm way more open to networking and going to other conferences now. Next time being open to talking to people and getting the full experience.