What does the fear of being judged by others hold you back from doing that you would otherwise do?

To be fair I still do these things but only when I’m alone.

Personally I love finding big puddles and then dig drains with a stick or my heel and watch the water flow.

Also love to throw a piece of wood into water and then toss stones high up in the air and try hit it imagining it’s a warship I’m trying to bomb.

Then also without going into details there are some pieces of clothing I would like to wear but don’t because they’re considered femine or gay.

xxmikelxx,

not much these days. ever since I realised people will judge you even if you don’t do anything. e.g. I used to be shy because i was worried about what they’d think of me when i spoke. this caused them to think I’m shy. so I made a decision that I’d rather have people judge me for who I am rather than for someone I’m not.

Devi,

There's loads of little daft hobbies I either don't do at all or hide. I went magnet fishing with a friend once, we found some cool jewellery that I still have and it was fun, so I went home and bought my own kit, I've never been though cause I don't want to be that person doing it alone, or to actually ask anyone to come. Just lives in a box.

LongPigFlavor, (edited )

In my past I used to take on janitorial or maintenance jobs, but the grossness of the job combined with the attitude of the general public just made it unbearable. People would ask me if I was a citizen and when I said yes, they’d tell me that it’s a job for immigrants. They’d also say that it’s a job for slaves and ask if I felt like a slave doing that kind of work.

WololoWarrior,

Holy shit. Those are horrible people.

victron,
@victron@programming.dev avatar

Shitty people, amirite.

Sorry, I really couldn’t stop myself.

Elferrerito,

Some people are so horrible…

sibloure,

Wow! That is surprising to hear.

Dubious_Fart,

I used to do Janitorial work, And I got respect for it.

And you deserve respect for it to.

because decent people understand you are the fulcrum upon which their nice world balances on.

People like you deal with have less value than the effluence from an overflowing toilet.

Sorry you deal with such shitty people man.

grayman,

Go get a job pumping septic tanks. Customer disrespects you? Walk off the job leaving them with backed up poo. Generally people are glad to see you. Good money if you can get to the point of running your own truck. Some dudes making good money posting about septic pumping on YouTube too. Get out the auger and whip up a poop smoothie. Mmmm! Smells like money!

wewbull,

Anything criminal.

Really don’t need to be judged for that stuff.

Cruxifux,

I mean, generally I don’t let that stop me from doing what I want to do.

But I drink a lot, so that’s probably why I don’t care as much.

sanguinepar,
@sanguinepar@lemmy.world avatar

Practicing DJing. Neither my wife nor daughter are into their quality house music (neither am I, they would argue… 😀) and we have elderly neighbours, so I find it hard to find time to make a real effort to practice, and get self-conscious and disheartened pretty quickly.

My setup is in our living room area, so it’s not very convenient when people are doing just about anything downstairs. Would love to have a bit more space to make mistakes and make a noise without it bothering others.

I’d still be crap at it right enough… ;-)

victron,
@victron@programming.dev avatar

I’d still be crap at it right enough… ;-)

But wouldn’t it be soooo fun?

sanguinepar,
@sanguinepar@lemmy.world avatar

Oh, most definitely! :-)

irmoz,

Singing

Black_Gulaman,
@Black_Gulaman@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

Crime, I don’t like being judged as guilty.

SharkEatingBreakfast, (edited )
@SharkEatingBreakfast@sh.itjust.works avatar

Because when I do what I want, I get called a “retard” or asked “what the fuck are you doing?” by the people around me. I make a point to try to do things quietly (stopping to observe a cool bug, making chalk drawings on the sidewalk, saying “wheee!” on the swings, etc.), but it really doesn’t matter.

I’ve caught glimpses of people filming me before, so I now only do what I want in privacy.

Also doesn’t help that I’ve been accused of “doing it for attention.” Nah, my dude, pretty sure I’m just fckin’ autistic.

I only want people to leave me alone now. I don’t like having to justify my actions when I’m just trying to enjoy myself.

khannie,
@khannie@lemmy.world avatar

People who love you should be happy that something’s bringing you joy.

I would gently suggest surrounding yourself with kinder people. You should be able to stop and look at an insect in fascination or swing on a swing without being abused.

You’ll find those people :)

SharkEatingBreakfast,
@SharkEatingBreakfast@sh.itjust.works avatar

Thank you. Maybe one day.

cubedsteaks,

I mean, they mentioned people filming them. I don’t know if they can surround themselves with kinder people to avoid that situation. That sounds like a general public issue if people are just filming someone like that.

Think of those shitty videos you see people upload. Like that lady on the airplane who was having a fucking mental breakdown. And people were just filming it for their own amusement.

hate to say it but people in general really do suck.

CloverSi,

I hate this so much. People should be free to act like they want (as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone), because why the hell not? What’s so objectively better about acting in the ‘normal’ way? But everything outside the very narrow idea of normal is treated like a problem by default.

I have some tics that come out when I’m alone that I’ve filtered out around others as long as I can remember, and honestly I think that’s part of why I feel so claustrophobic in social situations. I don’t even know how to act like ‘myself’ in public if I want to.

Seeing people being themselves regardless of how it looks to the current typical sensibilities is the only thing that lets me feel like I might be able to do the same. So fwiw, every little bit of rule breaking you have done or will do makes the world a little better for me, and anyone else who doesn’t feel welcome. Thanks.

miss_brainfart,
@miss_brainfart@lemmy.ml avatar

The difference between weird reactions and no reaction when observing cool bugs is holding a camera

bastian_5,

Answering this question is any deeper way that this lmao

Thorny_Thicket,

You desire to kick grannies don’t you?

Black_Gulaman,
@Black_Gulaman@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

You don’t?

DocBlaze,

not much anymore these days. the older I get the more I realize other people are full of shit anyway and I don’t need their opinions for anything. the only judgement I fear is of law enforcement, so I guess, crimes?

we all like to think we are good people but studies have shown that the number one deterrent for murder is…a very strict and harsh law against murder

user224, (edited )
@user224@lemmy.sdf.org avatar

Getting onto HRPT. I’d need to get to a field with unobstructed view of sky. Now imagine walking through the city with an 80cm satellite dish.
People stare weirdly even if I am just standing in middle of soccer field for 15 minutes with a V-Dipole to receive APT/LRPT.
Speaking of APT, theoretically I have beautiful pass of NOAA-18 in a little over an hour. (Edit: Got that one: lemmy.sdf.org/post/2767357)
Hmmm…

Meho_Nohome,
@Meho_Nohome@sh.itjust.works avatar

Makes me think of this.

MORTARS,
@MORTARS@lemmy.ml avatar

Wearing my comfy lil shorts 😩 I got a big ass and u kno

AngrilyEatingMuffins,

Are we including juries?

shinigamiookamiryuu,

Where do I start with this one? I have so much to circumventing I would have to do if I want to be myself, and that’s not really anyone’s fault either (so nothing with a solution). The last thing you mentioned is a fairly good example, I’m locked in certain aesthetics. I can’t unpack myself in someone’s presence much of the time. I can’t communicate without fear of messing up. I can’t hypothetically hone certain things I arguably should’ve honed. I could list these things. I do try going against this pattern and only a few things worked out.

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