It’s a song that speaks to your flavour of depression. Makes you feel like someone feels the exact same way you do. That in turn makes you feel sane. Like you’re heard. Even understood.
Over time, songs (or movies or other things) can become a ritual - you feel awful, listen to the song, eventually you come out the other side as the depressive episode fades. Then the next time it happens you associate the song with your recovery. So over time it becomes What You Do when you Feel That Way.
What song would you recommend to someone who has done things she regrets when she had the opportunity to have something good and lives with the still-ongoing snowball effect that she is so used to seeing as karmic that she doesn’t typically bring up any of the issues?
Priest is an electronic music project originally formed by ex-members of the hugely popular band Ghost. I’d call this Darkwave, but the label doesn’t matter, it’s depeche mode-y and don’t let the gimp mask put you off, I believe the song is very sincere.
<span style="color:#323232;">I can't stop, it's too late, it pours out, it's my fate
</span><span style="color:#323232;">My legacy in black
</span><span style="color:#323232;">Looking in to my eyes, see the things i despise
</span><span style="color:#323232;">My soul is tainted black
</span><span style="color:#323232;">
</span><span style="color:#323232;">I traveled with the enemy, i thought it was my destiny
</span><span style="color:#323232;">I'm free of all the lunacy
</span><span style="color:#323232;">I never want it back, my history in black
</span><span style="color:#323232;">
</span><span style="color:#323232;">Silent screams longing voice, violent dreams, ringing noise
</span><span style="color:#323232;">My memory is black
</span><span style="color:#323232;">It's not a mask, it's my skin
</span><span style="color:#323232;">Please don't ask where i've been
</span><span style="color:#323232;">My heart is painted black
</span><span style="color:#323232;">
</span><span style="color:#323232;">I traveled with the enemy, i thought it was my destiny
</span><span style="color:#323232;">I'm free of all the lunacy
</span><span style="color:#323232;">I'm never want it back, my history in black
</span><span style="color:#323232;">
</span><span style="color:#323232;">I escaped from the cage inside
</span><span style="color:#323232;">
</span><span style="color:#323232;">I traveled with the enemy, i thought it was my destiny
</span><span style="color:#323232;">I'm free of all the lunacy
</span><span style="color:#323232;">I never want it back, my history in black
</span><span style="color:#323232;">My history in black
</span>
The Great Below – Nine Inch Nails. (About 5 months in 2001 while addicted to Everquest).
The Beginning is End is the Beginning – Smashing Pumpkins (this version: youtu.be/0fDZD46IZ5Q?si=CyfMtrWL7YbtsEs7) (during my undergrad thesis crunch time crisis circa 2009)
This is probably the best answer I’ve seen. Watching them build the song over the OK Computer tour when you were sure they were going to implode… It hits just right.
It’s not really a single song for me, it really depends on how depressed I am and whether I want to dive deeper into it (which really helps a lot sometimes) or make myself feel better.
Dive-in (including, but not limited to):
The album Spiderland by Slint is pretty much full of depression songs for me, gloomy and full of dread. Don, Aman and Washer in particular are very hard hitting for me.
F#A#∞ by Godspeed You! Black Emperor has similar vibes but is a lot more dystopian and pessimistic. Ever since hearing East Hastings in 28 Days Later it’s been my favourite song on the album.
Feel better (including, but not limited to):
Everybody Hurts by R.E.M.; I normally don’t like this kind of songs but this one just feels honest and sincere which I can appreciate, plus Michael Stipe just has a great voice.
Down Under by Men At Work; Pretty much the polar opposite of the post-punk/-rock songs mentioned above. I really want to move to Australia one day and this song reminds me of that goal.
Happiness/The Gondola Man by Elliott Smith; just a nice song and I really like Elliott’s voice.
Mine is for a very specific kind of depression that’s really more of a vibe of melancholic regret and realization of self limitations which breeds a strange, nearly apathetic anxiety. The Devil And God Are Raging Inside Me by Brand New (full album) just picks at a scab that you know probably isn’t healthy but feels satisfying to indulge.
For existential dread, Dark Side of the Moon by Pink Floyd hits way different now than when I was young. Especially the songs Time and Great Gig In The Sky.
For depression depression, I couldn’t be bothered to listen to any music. “Music is for winners” is kinda the mindset. Not helpful, but depression is a motherfucker and it’s almost like self-inflicted emotional abuse when you’re already vulnerable. You feel miserable and convince yourself that you deserve misery, so all is right in the world. It fucking sucks and I hope that if this comment causes anything in anybody’s brain to light up, saying “hey wait a minute, is that not normal?”, then please invest in yourself and spend some time with a therapist, take more vitamin D, and try to do what you can to get yourself to a place where those feelings are just memories that you can mention on Lemmy in hopes of helping others the same way that you needed help.
The Devil and God Are Raging Inside Me is such a good album. In some ways I hate listening to it because I know it’s not helping me but at the same time everything about it is just perfect
I overheard a guy tell his friend ‘it’s Beck, but without all the gadgets’ and I thought that was hilarious so I checked it out (as was going through a tough break up years ago), and damn was it perfect
I’ve got a playlist, “Everything sucks but that’s ok”. This Year by The Mountain Goats is usually a solid pick. It’s wistful and defiant without being too sweet.
I got so tired of discussing my future I started avoiding the people I love Evenings of silence and mornings of nausea Shake and sweat and I can’t throw up
And if things are starting to get a little better Good As It Gets by Little Hurt is great. It is incredibly catchy.
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