Would it make sense for a person in a "privileged class" to move from a red state?

Trying to gauge if I’m going crazy or a little too much “online.”

I currently live in Texas, and moving has been on my mind a lot lately as the Republican party and Texas itself seems to be slowly moving toward fascism. I don’t know when the slide toward fascism will stop, and how much more authoritarian the state will get. I do not feel very good about my tax dollars going to support this state.

I am a middle-aged cishet white man; middle to upper middle class software engineer. I have leftist opinions (libsoc/ansoc), but I’m not an activist (I am very introverted, probably a little bit on the autism spectrum, and pretty much a hermit right now). I do seldom indulge in marijuana consumption, which is illegal here.

I really don’t have much tying me down here. I have no close friends, no family in the state, and no current romantic partners. Last year, I moved within the state for a job, but the company was bought out, and everyone was layed off. I have very high autonomy at my current job, and could probably work fully remote if I wanted. Moving would be expensive (I am in an upside-down mortgage), but I have enough savings to take the hit.

I am personally feeling very isolated here (Texas suburb), at this point in my life, and am thinking about moving into some sort of intentional community (eco-village, cohousing, or land trust; not a commune) in a blue state (or even in Canada if I could pull that off).

Also, the weather in the last 2 years has been absolutely oppressive, and I have a hard time keeping anything alive in my veggie garden :)

Am I being over dramatic? Should I just stick it out here, and try to rebuild my life in a state that doesn’t align with my beliefs?

Also, I’ve heard arguments that libs should stay or even move to red states, but I’m not convinced. The state rules with an iron fist, and pre-empts anything progressive Texas cities try to do. And the district I live in is already pretty solidly blue. Not to mention, red states put families that contain females or lbgt people in danger.

Very_Bad_Janet,

OP, you mentioned that you are unattached but are you looking for a romantic relationship in your future? You also don't mention your sexual orientation. Are there enough potential partners for you (similar POV, politics, culture, hobbies, curiosity about the world, etc.) that a relationship would be harmonious? If you do establish a relationship where you are and maybe decide to raise kids there, how do you feel about the education they would receive, the ideas and beliefs they will be exposed to? What is your partner needs an abortion or your kids are LGBTQ+? Just trying to see if you are planning to be solo indefinitely/permanently - potentially creating a family will add more variables to your calculations.

zlatiah,
@zlatiah@kbin.social avatar

Hey OP, I am similar to you in most aspects but I'm a lot younger, so please take it with a grain of salt...

I also live in Texas, and honestly I thought a lot of less privileged folks or ppl with family ties would love to be in your situation and just leave? It's not just about politics. Even if tomorrow Texas becomes a liberal stronghold, it will still take possibly at least a decade to fix ERCOT, the climate issue, and flooding issues (if you live in Houston)... This clusterfrick alone was enough to prompt me to never live in Texas again once I'm done with grad school

Besides, my understanding is that there are a few left-leaning metro areas which have suburbs (or live in the city!) that don't cost that much more to live in compared to mid-/upper-mid-class TX suburbs, so there's probably no financial disincentive to move either

MiddleWeigh,
@MiddleWeigh@lemmy.world avatar

Hey you sound just like me. If your going to move, perhaps somewhere like PA? It’s got the benefit of being a battleground state, and there’s more than enough rural areas, even relatively close to the cities, where you can continue your hermitage. I’m doing something similar (:

Magister,
@Magister@lemmy.world avatar

I’m like you, 50s, middle class software developer, WFH, never will vote conservatives. I’m already in a right place (Québec). Yeeeeaaaaarrrssss ago I wanted to move to the USA of course, opportunities, money, freedom, etc, then I saw what was going on south of my border and decided to stay in Canada, it was a good non move.

If I were at your place in life, I would definitively move, especially because Texas. Moving to Canada maybe be complicated, to legally work here (and don’t go to alberta, the north texas), but maybe try New England? Boston for instance. If you prefer smaller city maybe Burlington? I don’t know west coast enough now, but Seattle was in my plan years ago, but now I’m not sure it’s the right place…

Yepthatsme,

I was in the middle of biker nazi desert town building expensive homes for rich people and yes, it was time to go once covid set in and their families started moving back and spreading their nazi propaganda at the local small destination town businesses. The weather is destroyed. We lost out monsoon 5 years ago. The weirdos in AZ jumping the border to cause trouble in CA has been annoying. The Republican representatives cater to racists and have been trying to switch leadership without elections. I shit you not.

Get out now because I assure you it is not getting better.

Godric,

If you don’t like it, leave! That said, if you’re worried you’re too “online” as you said, you probably should also look for opinions from people not online.

coffeecoffeecoffee89,

I just moved from NC to the Pacific Northwest for very similar reasons. Remote work in tech and no close family ties back in NC. My partner and I moved here a few months ago and while the cost of living is definitely an adjustment, it has been a positive change in every other way. The weather is great and the people are wonderful. I no longer get nervous or anxious going out in public. I actually enjoy restaurants and farmers markets here. You only get one life. Be happy.

casualhippo,

Hey you’ve clearly been thinking a lot about this and where you want to take your life. It will take effort either way, whether you choose to build your life there or elsewhere, so feel the freedom to try something else. If you’re undecided, maybe think about what you would regret the least. I’ve also thought making a quick pros and cons list for myself helps. Best of luck to you

Wirrvogel,
@Wirrvogel@feddit.de avatar

Heat waves, droughts and extreme water events. If this is already a problem where you live, I would move. I need my garden. I need the world around me to be green and not burn me to a crisp or my quality of life is gone. I need my state to do what is possible to keep it green and cool and Texas does not have the best record in doing that.

For a ‘hermit’ person, finding a closer community could also be a very good thing. Do it when you are young. It’s much harder if you’re like me, approaching your 60s. The older we get, the harder it is to make big changes. I just made one because I know I’m going to stay single, but I don’t want to be a lonely old person. I like solitude, but only if it is a choice, and where I live now I have a close-knit community when I need company and space to myself. I am happy with the change, but getting used to a new place takes a lot of time now and it is a bit scary how hard it is on me compared to even bigger changes I made when I was 30.

Blue states also need people to defend democracy. You can be a pillar of democracy anywhere in the US, and keeping democracy up will keep the red states from going completely crazy.

Whatever your decision will be, I wish you the best!

solstice,

I’m right there with you in almost an identical situation only in Florida. Honestly though it doesn’t suck here nearly as much as Reddit and the media want you to believe. At least not for people like us anyway…

At the end of the day I try to ignore all the macroscopic issues that I have no control over. There’s a few things missing from my life here that are not missing elsewhere, so I’m 99% going to move soon.

I don’t mean this in a selfish way but I think the best thing to do is whatever is best for you regardless of all the white noise around you.

jadedwench,

I left Texas many years ago and you couldn’t pay me enough to move back. Get out. Go experience other communities, cultures, and locations. Go somewhere where any future romantic partners have actual human rights and healthcare. Go somewhere that doesn’t have a state flag as part of its identity. It will be an adjustment, but change can be good.

PostMalort,

I’m in a similar situation in Florida. Florida is where I’ve spent my whole life and the natural beauty of the state is incredible. However the government here is insane. They attack liberals at every chance, and are rewriting education to fit a disneyfied history. My wife and I are currently looking to get out. Change here seems hopeless between gerrymandering, and the massive influx of red voting retirees. Michigan sounds amazing to me except for the winters. We’ve discussed Colorado , but it’s pretty expensive, and the water management in the west is worrisome. We’re just on the lookout for what fits us. The only thing that’s certain is that we aren’t long for Florida. I am forced from my home by retirees and insane politicians.

solstice,

I just spent some time in savannah which was great. Reasonably priced and Georgia is a blueish purple state. Charleston SC is quite nice as well but more expensive. Something to consider.

AnaNg,

Yep. I’m middle aged and have lived in FL most of my life. While the nature is beautiful, they’re paving over more and more of it everyday. It’s hot and humid and buggy. But, the actual reason we’re leaving is my trans child. I don’t want to be in a state that actively hates my family. We’re looking at Illinois.

PostMalort,

It’s horrendous how the Florida government is treating trans people. I hope you and your family find happiness and can live comfortably away from these bigots. Maybe one day Florida will change, but currently it’s the absolute worst.

Also on a lighter note is your username a They Might Be Giants reference?

AnaNg,

Yes it is! First song I ever heard from them.

PostMalort,

Great band! We’re about to have our first child and I can’t wait to introduce her to they might be Giants.

AnaNg,

That’s great! I love their kid’s songs. When mine were babies I didn’t really know any lullabies so I sang She’s An Angel. Good luck with the baby!

PostMalort,

Thanks. She’s really the catalyst for us to leave Florida. I want her to get a good education and not be surrounded by a hateful shitty government.

Holyhandgrenade,

If you think living somewhere else will make you happier, you should do it as long as it doesn’t screw you over financially. Even if you’re probably not at risk of persecution as a white male, I can fully understand not wanting to live in a christofascist hellscape. If you have friends in a more desirable area I’d consider moving there.

Flarp,

Yes, moving from FL to DC has been a huge change in terms of the people I meet and the culture. Would definitely recommend

solstice,

The whole DMV area is amazing, congrats on the move! I’d live there in a heartbeat if it were in the cards.

pjhenry1216,

You can't be a useful protestor/advocator/supporter of any movement if you don't address your mental health and well being first. It's a bit more nuanced than do what makes you happiest, but more like do what makes you happiest and can still sleep well at night I guess.

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