Would it make sense for a person in a "privileged class" to move from a red state?

Trying to gauge if I’m going crazy or a little too much “online.”

I currently live in Texas, and moving has been on my mind a lot lately as the Republican party and Texas itself seems to be slowly moving toward fascism. I don’t know when the slide toward fascism will stop, and how much more authoritarian the state will get. I do not feel very good about my tax dollars going to support this state.

I am a middle-aged cishet white man; middle to upper middle class software engineer. I have leftist opinions (libsoc/ansoc), but I’m not an activist (I am very introverted, probably a little bit on the autism spectrum, and pretty much a hermit right now). I do seldom indulge in marijuana consumption, which is illegal here.

I really don’t have much tying me down here. I have no close friends, no family in the state, and no current romantic partners. Last year, I moved within the state for a job, but the company was bought out, and everyone was layed off. I have very high autonomy at my current job, and could probably work fully remote if I wanted. Moving would be expensive (I am in an upside-down mortgage), but I have enough savings to take the hit.

I am personally feeling very isolated here (Texas suburb), at this point in my life, and am thinking about moving into some sort of intentional community (eco-village, cohousing, or land trust; not a commune) in a blue state (or even in Canada if I could pull that off).

Also, the weather in the last 2 years has been absolutely oppressive, and I have a hard time keeping anything alive in my veggie garden :)

Am I being over dramatic? Should I just stick it out here, and try to rebuild my life in a state that doesn’t align with my beliefs?

Also, I’ve heard arguments that libs should stay or even move to red states, but I’m not convinced. The state rules with an iron fist, and pre-empts anything progressive Texas cities try to do. And the district I live in is already pretty solidly blue. Not to mention, red states put families that contain females or lbgt people in danger.

angrylittlekitty,

agree with what everyone else has said here. worry less about “should” and go find your tribe wherever it may be.

as i once said to a friend who contemplated the same kind of move years ago, if it doesn’t work out you can always move back. not like it’s a one way street.

eldavi,

yes, it’s the definition of privilege since most don’t have that privilege and i’ve recently become a member to that privileged class (for now atleast); which is how i can recognize it.

i also do software and i was in austin and left a couple of weeks ago because i’m not cishet nor white but still experienced enough bigotry (especially from gay texans) that it was impacting my psyche, so i had to leave and i feel sorry for whomever is like me but is stuck there because of something as silly as not having the opportunity to do software.

MajorHavoc,

Sounds like you’re ready for a change.

I encourage you to focus more on where you’re moving to, then where you’re moving from.

This is a chance to choose a community that supports your hobbies and interests.

As others mentioned, it also makes sense to consider the impact of local policies and amenities on both yourself and your future friends or lovers. Life can be simpler if you already live in a place that supports whoever you may end up building a life with later.

dan1101,

Since you have the means and nothing to tie you down, I’d say go for it. It would be interesting to try living somewhere different. You only have so many years to experience life. Any sort of rural area further North should still be affordable and be kinder to your vegetable garden.

Very_Bad_Janet,

OP, you mentioned that you are unattached but are you looking for a romantic relationship in your future? You also don't mention your sexual orientation. Are there enough potential partners for you (similar POV, politics, culture, hobbies, curiosity about the world, etc.) that a relationship would be harmonious? If you do establish a relationship where you are and maybe decide to raise kids there, how do you feel about the education they would receive, the ideas and beliefs they will be exposed to? What is your partner needs an abortion or your kids are LGBTQ+? Just trying to see if you are planning to be solo indefinitely/permanently - potentially creating a family will add more variables to your calculations.

zlatiah,
@zlatiah@kbin.social avatar

Hey OP, I am similar to you in most aspects but I'm a lot younger, so please take it with a grain of salt...

I also live in Texas, and honestly I thought a lot of less privileged folks or ppl with family ties would love to be in your situation and just leave? It's not just about politics. Even if tomorrow Texas becomes a liberal stronghold, it will still take possibly at least a decade to fix ERCOT, the climate issue, and flooding issues (if you live in Houston)... This clusterfrick alone was enough to prompt me to never live in Texas again once I'm done with grad school

Besides, my understanding is that there are a few left-leaning metro areas which have suburbs (or live in the city!) that don't cost that much more to live in compared to mid-/upper-mid-class TX suburbs, so there's probably no financial disincentive to move either

MiddleWeigh,
@MiddleWeigh@lemmy.world avatar

Hey you sound just like me. If your going to move, perhaps somewhere like PA? It’s got the benefit of being a battleground state, and there’s more than enough rural areas, even relatively close to the cities, where you can continue your hermitage. I’m doing something similar (:

Magister,
@Magister@lemmy.world avatar

I’m like you, 50s, middle class software developer, WFH, never will vote conservatives. I’m already in a right place (Québec). Yeeeeaaaaarrrssss ago I wanted to move to the USA of course, opportunities, money, freedom, etc, then I saw what was going on south of my border and decided to stay in Canada, it was a good non move.

If I were at your place in life, I would definitively move, especially because Texas. Moving to Canada maybe be complicated, to legally work here (and don’t go to alberta, the north texas), but maybe try New England? Boston for instance. If you prefer smaller city maybe Burlington? I don’t know west coast enough now, but Seattle was in my plan years ago, but now I’m not sure it’s the right place…

Yepthatsme,

I was in the middle of biker nazi desert town building expensive homes for rich people and yes, it was time to go once covid set in and their families started moving back and spreading their nazi propaganda at the local small destination town businesses. The weather is destroyed. We lost out monsoon 5 years ago. The weirdos in AZ jumping the border to cause trouble in CA has been annoying. The Republican representatives cater to racists and have been trying to switch leadership without elections. I shit you not.

Get out now because I assure you it is not getting better.

Godric,

If you don’t like it, leave! That said, if you’re worried you’re too “online” as you said, you probably should also look for opinions from people not online.

coffeecoffeecoffee89,

I just moved from NC to the Pacific Northwest for very similar reasons. Remote work in tech and no close family ties back in NC. My partner and I moved here a few months ago and while the cost of living is definitely an adjustment, it has been a positive change in every other way. The weather is great and the people are wonderful. I no longer get nervous or anxious going out in public. I actually enjoy restaurants and farmers markets here. You only get one life. Be happy.

casualhippo,

Hey you’ve clearly been thinking a lot about this and where you want to take your life. It will take effort either way, whether you choose to build your life there or elsewhere, so feel the freedom to try something else. If you’re undecided, maybe think about what you would regret the least. I’ve also thought making a quick pros and cons list for myself helps. Best of luck to you

Flarp,

Yes, moving from FL to DC has been a huge change in terms of the people I meet and the culture. Would definitely recommend

solstice,

The whole DMV area is amazing, congrats on the move! I’d live there in a heartbeat if it were in the cards.

Wirrvogel,
@Wirrvogel@feddit.de avatar

Heat waves, droughts and extreme water events. If this is already a problem where you live, I would move. I need my garden. I need the world around me to be green and not burn me to a crisp or my quality of life is gone. I need my state to do what is possible to keep it green and cool and Texas does not have the best record in doing that.

For a ‘hermit’ person, finding a closer community could also be a very good thing. Do it when you are young. It’s much harder if you’re like me, approaching your 60s. The older we get, the harder it is to make big changes. I just made one because I know I’m going to stay single, but I don’t want to be a lonely old person. I like solitude, but only if it is a choice, and where I live now I have a close-knit community when I need company and space to myself. I am happy with the change, but getting used to a new place takes a lot of time now and it is a bit scary how hard it is on me compared to even bigger changes I made when I was 30.

Blue states also need people to defend democracy. You can be a pillar of democracy anywhere in the US, and keeping democracy up will keep the red states from going completely crazy.

Whatever your decision will be, I wish you the best!

solstice,

I’m right there with you in almost an identical situation only in Florida. Honestly though it doesn’t suck here nearly as much as Reddit and the media want you to believe. At least not for people like us anyway…

At the end of the day I try to ignore all the macroscopic issues that I have no control over. There’s a few things missing from my life here that are not missing elsewhere, so I’m 99% going to move soon.

I don’t mean this in a selfish way but I think the best thing to do is whatever is best for you regardless of all the white noise around you.

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