PM_me_your_vagina_thanks,

I want my best friend alive again, and the cancer to be gone. He can have the third.

sanosuke001,

I’d give all three of mine to this guy.

Sorry for your loss ;(

Godnroc,

The power to change things, the knowledge of how to change things for a desired outcome, and the wisdom to know if I should.

HubertManne,
@HubertManne@kbin.social avatar

good one

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA,
@HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

I wish I had a turkey sandwich. On rye bread. With lettuce, and mustard.

ShitOnABrick,
@ShitOnABrick@lemmy.world avatar

Priorities

son_named_bort,

The turkey’s a little dry?

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA,
@HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

THE TURKEYS A LITTLE DRY!? OH FOUL THE CURSED THING. WHAT DEMON FROM THE DEPTHS OF HELL CREATED THEE?

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA,
@HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

Wait I thought of a second wish. That politician? The one You (yes you) don’t like? Every time they open their mouth to talk in public or when there’s something around to record they let out the grossest nastiest wettest fart like they gotta go check, but everything’s dry. But it’s so nasty they gotta go check every time. For the rest of their life.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA,
@HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

And going and checking is part of the wish I want cspan to get interesting

pdxfed,

More of an MLT guy myself, nothing like a good Mutton Lettuce and Tomato when the tomato’s are just 🤌

Narrrz,

a private reality which obeys whatever rules i want it to.

the ability to interface this reality with any others, as well as disconnect it, at will.

yyyesss,

shit. this is top tier wishing right here

Narrrz,

don't forget to make your first wish "if i, as i am now or as i become subsequent to their fulfilment, am unsatisfied with the outcome of any of my wishes, i wish to return to the moment i first was granted them, retaining full knowledge of the timeline as i caused it to be but with the ability to make diffent choices"

since we're supposed to not be dealing with a monkey paw/genie situation, i didn't use it this way, but in general I'd recommend making it your first wish under any such circumstances.

rephrase as necessary to further weed out possible loopholes.

rustyfish,
@rustyfish@lemmy.world avatar
  1. Immortality.
  2. The ability to link one’s life to mine, effectively make others immortal.
  3. Plant the Overview Effect into the mind of every human and make it a part of humanity’s consciousness forever.
AgentGrimstone,

Everyone becomes a god of their own universe. Now you all can do whatever the hell you want.

refurbishedrefurbisher,
  1. Infinite positive-effects-only wishes (what I consider to be positive)
  2. Everyone now has empathy and selflessness, eliminating corruption, greed, stepping over each other, exploitation, etc.
  3. Post-scarcity society, eliminating class even more than the above, since everyone can own whatever they want. Basically a real life Replicator.
  4. Since I got infinite wishes, given number 3, society will have an even bigger trash problem than we already have. So a convenient, self-contained black hole we can put trash into, inventing a method of creating dark matter, revolutioning how we store energy, Futurama-style, which then becomes free due to post-scarcity.
  5. Healthy planet, healthy people, healthy animals, plants, etc. Also includes mental health (infinite wishes are nice)
RBWells,

A replicator solves the trash problem, you just throw the trash in the replicator and it breaks it down to build stuff.

I choose you to get the wishes. Your list is my list. I don’t wish for immortality - since I had kids, I’m disqualified. But 10x the lifespan with hundreds of years feeling like I do now, that would be nice, and with the replicator technology (who will get the manual on how to service these) the carrying capacity of the earth should be higher.

key,
@key@lemmy.keychat.org avatar

Mastery over life and death

The ability to change all aspects of myself at will

Ownership of a well-organized collection of infinite-lifespan SSDs (100TB each) collectively containing English translations of all encyclopedias that have or will ever exist, human or otherwise, including full version history. And the proper facility for storing such.

Usernameblankface,
@Usernameblankface@lemmy.world avatar

A fully stocked r&d shop for me, that transportation infrastructure in the US would be consistently less car dependent in the future, and world peace.

captainlezbian,

Fix the environmental and ecological collapse, end bigotry, the ability to shapeshift

JimboDHimbo,
  1. The ability to teleport anything anywhere (a few mfs would get to Mars wayy earlier than they thought)
  2. Wipe all debt and records of debt world wide
  3. Flips locs to the side and smiles world peace

E: #3 is needed to prevent #2 from causing mass chaos, and I’d be using #1 for at least 5 years before enacting #2 or #3.

gullible,
  1. To be able to convince anyone of anything, without reservations, whenever I choose
  2. That I can never be forcefully contained within any construct or vessel, allowing me to leave whenever I like and return as I please.
  3. Become a genie
  4. Iunno, whatever I feel like convincing the first person to rub my completely voluntary lamp to wish for.
TheBananaKing,
  • Reduce atmospheric CO2 to pre-industrial levels
  • Give me the ability to see/hear remote locations at will.
  • Give me Jessica Jones style mind-control, but without needing to be physically present.

'scuse me while I go unfuck some shit.

BodePlotHole,

Wipe the student loan debt and I’ll donate the other two wishes to charity.

Seriously, fuck this six figures of bullshit.

BowserBasher,

To own my own theme park in which the rides never break down so that everyone can enjoy it anytime.

£10 million. I think that’s more than enough to live off.

The ability to forget something at will so that I can experience something again for the first time.

firecat,

Granted you now live in a loop experiencing the wish event until you die.

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