I can understand why, they provide a better longevity as a safe space for the queer community in general. Like, I found that many gay bars have a serious longevity issue, gay guys come, straight woman who don’t want to be hit on come (some try and hit on the gay/bi guys there… which is just… a whole thing) then a bunch of straight guys show up because they hear there are lots of women at the place (and get upset when gay guys hit on them…)
So like i can see how lesbian bar would circumvent that, given the prevailing gender norms, you’re probably not going to get a bunch of straight guys seeking refuge from predatory woman coming to lesbian bars, and thus a bunch of straight women fallowing them and diluting the space.
I’m not trying to put blame on any group here, but like, trends driven by a series of innocent individual choices do be happening.
I mean, I think most of the time the goal is that they’re horny and see a lot of feminine presenting individuals in one place, and they’re to stupid, ignorant or sociopathic to understand.
They may puff up their chests and make a scene when rejected or told off but that’s probably an ego protection reaction on their part.
Perhaps I’m to generous, perhaps they go there just to make a scene, but I don’t really get what they would get out of that. Maybe they do it to impress their friends? It just seems like there are easier places for them to do that though.
I get that some people feel much safer in segregated company and if folks are enjoying that good for them, but to be honest I find the entire concept outdated at this point; these spaces just feel like not really living freely imho.
Meh, it’s nice to have a space that feels like it’s designed with my needs in mind, rather than being an after thought (and that’s the best case scenarios)
It’s more that it’s a bar that’s focused in its purpose. Gay people are a minority, so it’s practical to create a place where you know you’re more likely to find other gay people. Not just for romance, but just for having a community hub to find a social network and support specific to being a gay woman, rather than having to “filter” for it.
In a similar way that a dance club and a pub are for different demographics, the dance club gives people who want to dance a place to all go, and a pub gives a space for people who just want a quiet drink and some chips.
Yeah, I do see that. Though I would obviously not go to ANY pub (straight or gay) if my primary interest was to just dance.
At this stage of my life though, my confidence in who I am and how I want to live long ago moved me away from limiting my support circle to gay only communities or places. I find the mere idea even incredibly stifling and borderline offensive. This has more to do with my age and past experience with such things I suppose; I am probably much older than most people commenting here I imagine.
I live in San Francisco as well, so I don’t feel like I am in a minority. I mean yes, we probably are? but in context we have one of the highest percentages of LGBTQ population than any us city…so I don’t see myself in such terms as minority anymore. I don’t “filter” my exposure in social circles either - I just take things as they come. As a Euro transplant also, this comes second nature to me since there are cultural and linguistic differences I have also had to deal with.
Either way, I am glad that people who enjoy lesbian bars are finding more of them. I personally just wanted to express that I don’t find the concept of segregation appealing - even if there are safety or social benefits in it.
I had not really considered that lesbian bars existed. I’m well aware of gay bars, but never really thought about it. I’m glad to hear they’re returning! I’m also glad to see they’re more inclusive too!
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