For my annoying, limiting health issues to go away. Then I can enjoy every second of life, work hard, reach my full potential. Take care of my parents, achieve my dreams.
Get enough personal funding for my parents to be taken care of.
Then build indie games for the rest of my life. Making single person RPGs. Where the stories can fill the void of my need to write novels. And the themes being a culmination of all the games I have played that played a role in guiding some sense of morality or drama. Such as the last mission on Halo Reach or the Mass Effect Trilogy, or Outer Wilds etc.
I’d want to compose, do the artwork, and the development for first few. Spending years fine tuning every single detail as if it’s an elaborate sculpture.
Try different ones. It took me three doctors until I finally found one who decided to give me an ADHD and bipolar drug instead of an antidepressant, and it worked (well, mostly. Works well enough that I can enjoy my hobbies again, and that’s something).
So did the stuff I was originally on but it helped with nothing else.
Personally I’ve tried 3-4 different antidepressants and anxiety relief was a common effect (except Bupropion/Welbutrin, which made anxiety worse). So I wouldn’t stress it too much. Don’t be afraid to switch drugs and/or doctors if anxiety is the holdup.
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