@ashleyspencer@actuallyautistic My special interest has always related to my life stage, where the focus was clear, eg, parenting, studying, teaching etc. But now it looks like I’m retired, & I’m lost.
I don't know you at all, so my opinion is worth half of nothing, but it sounds to me as if your business is your special interest.
Mine too, as it happens, although I'm an employee. I get paid to do the one thing I want to do, the one thing I'm really any good at.
There are risks to that. If I lose my job or if it turns sour, I'll lose my special interest at the same time. That's a big shock. On the bright side, it's great to enjoy one's work.
But let me follow that up by saying that you don't need anyone's validation to be who you are, and you don't need anyone to tell you that you're doing autism properly. Everyone's unique. You are who you are, and that's enough.
My biggest problem is that almost anything can turn into a special interest. Today I walked through a sandpit, and there were these beautiful pebbles, all sorts of colours and structures. And my mind went: “wow, how exciting, look how beautiful they are! What kinds of rock are they? Where did they come from, how did they get here, how old are they? All the same age, or not? I should have studied geology!!” 🤣
I'm a problem solver and a lover of complex (not complicated) things, and I'm always excited when I discover new connections between seemingly unrelated things.
So I draw, I program, I read about science and technology, games (playing and making), history, jazz. Some go deeper than others but they all fulfill me in that special way.
What about your business fires you up? I think that's the clue to find more.
I find juggling many special interests hard at one time. So...I'm in the same boat with you: for the time being, my business is my main special interest. And no, it's not entirely healthy, so I try to make sure I get some free time every day and do other things I enjoy (some of them my former special interests that I have previously devoted more time & effort).
I do feel like, though, that having several special interest- level intense interests in my life would be exhausting. This one is fine, as long as I try to keep a healthy balance.
In general, I have just sort of stumbled upon my special interests. Read a little and then become more and more excited as I have realized how much fun there is hidden.
So, IMO, having just one special interest is not bad- as long as it's not the only thing in your life. Work is still work and no matter how engaging it is, there is -and needs to be- more to life than that.
Hm, that is a potential problem, but nothing that some careful thinking (as in, a few months should suffice 😁 ) can't fix.
Your concern is an important one, and not knowing the answer may cause unnecessary anxiety if, for any reason, you lost your business or ability to work permanenty or for unforeseeable length of time.
It brings peace to have one's identity, sense of self and understanding of self worth based on something that is not dependent on extrenal things. But what that "something" exactly is...that's for you to find out.
@ashleyspencer@actuallyautistic It's often called a 'hobby'. You don't have to have hobbies, btw. There are those of us with too many who take up the slack if you can't find one...and you haven't tried everything yet anyway.
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