Does the Fediverse have a similar feature, where communities/magazines can be private and only allow users to view/subscribe to them with mod approval?
I know this is possible with instances, but that seems impractical since the account would be defederated from the entire Fediverse to maintain privacy.
It will never be a safe space as long as spez is around
period. Centralized systems like Reddit are inherently beholden to the views of the people who own the central hub. Even if the people at Reddit now were “cool”, eventually a piece of shit would end up in a position of power and compromise the site. As we have seen time and time again, both recently and throughout history, we cannot allow our systems to be contingent on the assumed goodwill of the people who run it. Said differently, we need to assume that bastards will take control at some point in the future, and intentionally design our systems to be robust in the face of disturbances caused by bad actors.
At this point it seems likely that Reddit is so incompetent, they just ran a script to check if a subreddit was private and extort the mods if it was, without any check on how long the sub had been private.
This kinda feels like proactive cautionary action to protect their community (which absolutely is good) since they don't outright say admins have been threatening them. Because even an idiot should've figured out to check when the sub was set to private when creating that supposed script.
I had to stop posting photos of me feeding my baby on FB (even when you couldn't see shit or only a tiny bit of skin) because I would ALWAYS get random creeps PMing me.
I'm also an admin in a pregnancy/birth group and I constantly have to block scody arseholes from trying to join. It gets depressing sometimes. I can only imagine what r/breastfeeding mods have to endure to keep the community safe.
The reality is that creeps harassing pregnant women is the least of reddit's problems.
I mean, not so long ago reddit hired a paedophile apologist and IRC diaper play furry fetishist as an admin. They claim they forgot to vet them, but this is the site that tolerated a subreddit with pictures of underage girls for years and gave the mod a custom award.
Expecting reddit to be a safe space for this kind of thing, is like worrying about Epstein stealing beer from the fridge, after you've asked him to baby sit.
Honestly, you might as well burn the whole thing down to the ground. That's the only way to make that site safe for women.
Further reading for those who weren't around or didn't get to hear about it because of censorship on reddit:
I'm struggling to properly convey the feelings of Fremdscham and guilt by association that that kind of person gives me as a man. I feel like I need to apologize for something I wouldn't ever do myself nor let anyone I know get away with doing.
hey, in the eyes of this woman (me) at least, you seem to be doing your best. keep holding the people you know accountable for bad actions. act when you see bad behavior... it might not be safe to confront the offender, if so, support the victim. it's all you can do. in my opinion, you have no need to apologize for others... you can't change or control what another person will do. you can only control what you do.
I hear you on the guilt by association. But you don't ever need to apologise for being born who you are. What you do with your life is what matters the most. As @offendicula said, you can't control other people, you can only control yourself. Being a good role model to and good influence on other men and boys is one of the single best things you can do. :)
At inception I think it was legitimately a place for guys with oversized stuff to talk. Like, there are actual issues guys with giant dongs have to deal with.
But it quickly devolved into lulz my girl says my dick is too biiiggg!!!
If it's big enough, you can't even maintain an erection because it requires too much blood. Or wear several types of pants or underwear, or sit comfortably in certain kinds of seats, or sometimes even get the simple feeling that you're done peeing when you are. But "lol I hurt women with my massive 50-inch pecker" gets more upvotes.
From what I've heard, a big issue is condoms. Length isn't an issue, girth is. Too large or too small and it rolls up and/or is more likely to tear. Like a too small latex glove, except a dick there's nothing to stop the condom rolling up. Cleaning a toilet and the glove tears? Shit happens. Condom tears? Baby or STD happens. Not funny.
But from what I can tell, a lot of people who post in forums like that are roleplaying having a large dick or gay guys who want to creep on guys with large dicks. People are weird.
The other big problem is that if it's big enough, it may be uncomfortable or down right painful for any partner.
Again, that's usually more of a girth than a length problem, though too much length can also result in pain. (Bumping into the cervix is, for most women, a rather painful experience.)
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