That would be a long, slow, and painful way to go, and it’s not even guaranteed to get you before you kick the bucket from old age, after all not everyone dies of smoking before dying of something else. It also has plenty of nasty side effects that can affect your life in other ways such as causing you to stink (both from your clothes, but also an odor from your body), or giving you gum disease which can make your gums hurt and also cause you to lose your teeth.
I’m not sure what you’ve gone through but I do hope you can find some happiness in life and not choose to go such a horrible way.