That’s a bitter pill. I was lucky in that regard – my disabilities might be mild problems in the big picture, but give me a significant advantage in specific contexts like cram-studying. Surviving out of pure spite I am also quite good at too.
If we’re being honest, I don’t even know what I’d do if I had to deal with racism and armed police in my daily life. My biggest challenges were smaller things like poverty, bureaucracy, and hunger. Overcoming them made me stronger, sure – but strong enough to deal with that? I think I’d fall apart.
Integrating here was a strange thing. I more or less consider myself Vietnamese (if this isn’t my home and my culture, I don’t know what would be) but I was born white in Canada, and that’s what people see. It’s a weird mix of undeserved privilege and inconvenience. What’s really screwed up, is when other white people in Asia just start casually telling me about their crimes as if it’s a normal thing to talk about when there’s only white people in the room. Most people are not like that of course, but when it happens, it’s so fucked up. I don’t even know how to respond.