I get this. I was in my forties before anything started to make sense. Seems to me, though, especially listening to early-diagnosed autistic people, that it looks more one anvil vs. a different anvil. So many patterns of denied autonomy, undelivered opportunity, and overt dehumanisation. I can't say it's been MORE difficult being treated like I should have had the tools to be different than it would have been to deal with being broadly undervalued.