My friend keeps saying “cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water.” I know he means well.
My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and right!
I had a happy childhood. My dad used to put me in tires and roll me down hills. Those were Goodyears.
I really don’t understand why Marvel doesn’t use the Hulk to advertise more. He’s basically one big Banner.
Why don’t beans ever play hide and seek?
Because they always spill the beans!
How do you organize a space party?
You planet.
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she will let it go.
How many seconds are there in a year?
12 - January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd…….
Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?
Because he wanted to win the No-bell prize.
My friend keeps saying “cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water.”
I know he means well.
What’s the number for over-eaters anonymous?
88 8888 8888
My daughter asked if I was ever going stop singing Wonderwall.
I said maybe…
My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction.
So I packed up my stuff and right!
Did you hear about the guy who drank invisible ink?
He’s at the hospital waiting to be seen.
I had a happy childhood. My dad used to put me in tires and roll me down hills.
Those were Goodyears.
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent.
My wife said I should do lunges to stay in shape.
That would be a big step forward.
I really don’t understand why Marvel doesn’t use the Hulk to advertise more.
He’s basically one big Banner.
How do you get a country girl’s attention?
A tractor.