Can other Romance readers explain why insta love is so hated? I actually prefer insta love to the long drawn out getting to know characters. Like, for example, I actually prefer it when characters just meet and they have this instant but deep connection, like the universe was just biting it's time until it can get these people in the same room. I find the longer getting to know characters books without the instalove challenging to read. I'm more interested in how the MC's can sustain their instalove and deepen it. I find it difficult to follow characters as they're trying to get to know each other. #Romance#RomanceLandia@romancelandia
@weirdwriter@romancelandia Yes, my main pair are kind of "insta" but it becomes clear over time that they were both READY for it.
The main driver in romance is receptivity, IME.
One is vastly experienced yet bored. The other is sheltered but has been watching him for months. If they weren't compatible it wouldn't work, but they try it and it does.
Also one is a field agent with "high turnover" who has no time to lose. Other chars call him on this, he dun care. It's new to him!
@weirdwriter@romancelandia This is such an interesting take. I am (with a few exceptions) more of a fan of the slow burn. I think it mostly comes from the idea that instalove/, prosaically, an instant connection is either A. Unrealistic, or B. Childish/ somehow lesser to want.
@tmmahaff@romancelandia Oh! Interesting, and to be clear, when I say instalove, I'm talking about instant deep connection with banter and jokes and extremely deep conversations about the universe. I guess other people only see instalove as just a physical thing. I think Kennedy Ryan did Instalove well! 2 characters meet, they have jokes, they debate, they ask questions, there's clearly a deep connection going on even though they just met.
@weirdwriter@romancelandia I'm not an avid romance reader, I've sampled the genre though. I think the general vibe of the criticism is that insta-love gets overwhelmingly portrayed as romantic and lasting, when in reality there's very often something more sinister going on, ie: lovebombing by a would-be abuser or just a PUA playing a role to get laid. And this mismatch of representation can create false expectations that leave a lot of inexperienced girls/women unaware of red flags in real life
@weirdwriter@romancelandia or put another way: experienced girls and women don't find insta-love stories charming or relatable because the sort of hijinks that are generally included often make us feel viscerally disgusted by the male romantic lead. Cause, y'know, red flags flying everywhere
@weirdwriter@romancelandia well that's the problem, in the books the red flags usually amount to nothing. It's like reading a book where it feels so obvious that this character will turn out to be a twist villain but then you're supposed to just accept that all the hints you've been picking up on (ignoring boundaries is a big one) are actually totally cool and romantic. You can debate the merits of a rarity within the story, but it affects enjoyment when you know that not how that usually goes
for me, if they have an instant connection but still have their regular lives going on, sure, fine, that's cool, i can buy that. but when they're willing to throw away their lives for someone they met 5 minutes ago, i'm not really keen on it.
@weirdwriter@romancelandia I like instalove when it’s done well. When it’s just “See hot person, want to fuck them immediately” I don’t find it that interesting. I need the tension of them trying to make it last. But IRL I’m demisexual so may be part of it!
@TeaWhileWriting@romancelandia Gotcha! I always write slow burn in my romances because I find instalove to be very hard and challenging to write! Never could write instalove to save my life! I always write slow burn romances but love reading instalove/instant connection stories.
@weirdwriter@romancelandia I’m similar! I tend to write instalove but love reading slow burn. But sometimes slow burn is written so boringly you’re like how do these two even like each other? 😂😂
@TeaWhileWriting@romancelandia If you haven't read Kennedy Ryan, I'd give her books a shot! Not all instalove, but still, some are well written instalove and she writes first meeting connections very well in my opinion. I like her Hoops series, Long Shot especially, but also her Grip series. Long Shot needs a LOT of content warnings before going into it though!
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