Nihilism. Imagine there being no past nor future, but like a child in a waiting room for the abyss you’re given a paper and some crayons. Why wouldn’t you try to draw the greatest piece you could? And if something goes wrong, well it’s just a happy accident. It’s not like this matters anyway. That’s how I see my life. This mindset let’s me not stress over old mistakes, while still striving to be better. I don’t want to waste this metaphorical paper but it doesn’t matter what I do with it in greater whole, since there isn’t a greater whole.