Everything. Everything was surprising. It’s not just the motivation, it’s emotional complacency that’s gone too. My doormat instincts are gone, I can politely engage with problems instead of avoiding them. I do the things that I want to do.
On Saturday I did yardwork, took my youngest kid out for a run, then to the beach with our dog where tiny sunfish nipped at our legs, then rock climbing (she’s training for a team), then I made dinner from scratch, and then we went to a local free festival for bazaar shopping and a reggae concert with her big brother. It was amazing.
I’m in my 40s and I’m retroactively angry about my life.