half,
@half@lemmy.world avatar

About seven years ago, I quit dexmethylphenidate after eight years of various stimulants. I wish I could tell you there’s a general solution, but I was just reading a completely unrelated book and had to get up, log into Lemmy, and respond to this thread I skimmed past three hours ago. I do take caffeine (~400mg) and nicotine (~6-10mg) daily, as well as a drop of hemp oil weekly to manage the caffeine side effects, so I might be disqualified according to some, but I don’t think so. I’m sorry, but nothing will ever approach the unconditional dopamine of strong CNS stims.

Diet and exercise are essential. If I neglect them, I can fall into a loop of unproductive behavior. I mostly eat seeds, legumes, and veggies, with plenty of grain to facilitate cardio. I run 5-10K three times a week. I take protein (pea) and fiber (psyllium) supplements on top of a battery of vitamins. All of this helps me maintain a balance of stable productivity, but honestly the most life-changing thing I’ve ever done was get to a point in my career where I’m allowed to be productive on my own terms.

It took me until I was 26 to find a job where I was allowed to work mostly alone and be measured by my overall productivity instead of being graded by the horseshit pseudoscience that passes for academics and middle management. Obviously that’s not much help to you if you don’t have it yet, but please hold out. Don’t listen to the horde of people with a work ethic in place of a philosophy. I fucked up or walked away from so many opportunities. You can still find independence. Society needs divergent thinkers, they just don’t like to advertise it.

There are still days when I can’t get anything done. There are times like this when I abandon what I’m supposed to be doing and fixate on something that really isn’t part of the plan. My solution is to practice discipline generally so that I can forgive myself for wandering occasionally. I hope this isn’t too disappointing. Take baby steps and trust no bitch.

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