threeofus

aspiedan, 6 months ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic #aspergers #autism As Christmas holidays approach, I am worried about several things.

1. I have a busy and stressful job, but one in which I have a lot of control over things, a lot of routine, and an office I can hide in. I am worried about the drastic change in routine (or loss of it) and loss of control.

2. I love my wife, and kids to the moon and back, but they are unpredictable, and I end up apologising 24/7, and feeling guilty for being rubbish. Also they feel pressure to be happy knowing we don't get time together, which adds to tension and stress.

3. My family (parents and extended family) are not close, but my wifes are, and Christmas means gatherings, party games etc. And I feel guilty about avoiding them.

4. I feel obligued to be a festive jolly person to everyone as I do like Christmas and do not want to appear rude.

I have never really spoken about this till now, but I find it the hardest part of my year, and it takes so much energy to mask all the time. What I would love would be to hide away from everything, but there is so much expectation etc.

Sorry for the long rant but thanks for being a safe space to get this out!
:infinity_rainbow: :octo_sad: :blobcatpensive:

Likewise, 8 months ago to bookstodon

*Dark chocolate,
red wine,
autumn leaves,
& David Copperfield.
*it’s been eaten
#books #amreading #wine #photography @bookstodon