I think it is users job to find an Instance that does things in a way they will approve of.
You’re missing the forest for the trees here. If this sort of “defederation because I feel like it” shit catches on, the whole concept of the fediverse will not work. You can go to another instance, sure, but what if the admin of the instance that you just left desides they don’t want to federate with the instance that you’re going to join. Maybe they decide to be like Beehaw and make every instance that wants to federate meet their standards first.
The idea that users can just leave and find another instance only works if all instances are connected and being administrated fairly and unbiasedly. Increasingly that looks like it’s not going to be the reality, which means leaping around instances is going to result in hitting a lot of invisible walls.