You do realize homophobia is still… like, a thing, right?
Also, people constantly mention or reference their own sexuality. You don’t notice it because it’s straight, but every time a male coworker mentions his wife (or the opposite) that’s an indirect reference to their sexuality. Every time the male lead kisses the female lead in a movie. Every song where a male singer sings about their girlfriend or some girl they like. There are also baby shirts that say stuff like “lady’s man”. Granted, most people also find those ehh, but they exist.
Fact is, being straight is considered “normal”, and other sexualities weren’t, and still aren’t to many people. This means that, yes, some people are gonna make a deal about it.
Some of my friends never really “came out”, because it was actually normal for them, so they never had to figure it out. For myself, I was mildly homophobic when I was a teen, which meant figuring it out was a bit of a process, so me “coming out” did mean telling my friends. Now imagine how it is for somebody who grew up in an extremely homophobic environment.
All of the queer people I know irl “make it part of their identity” just as much as you might make “being left-handed” or “being spanish” part of your identity. That is to say, it’s a fact about them they might mention occasionally when relevant, or make jokes about it, or reference the culture. But you don’t bitch about that, do you?
TLDR: your comment seems to stem from pretty complete ignorance about… well, everything you’re talking about. Please don’t be dismissive about stuff you don’t know much about, it makes you look bad and a lil’ self-centered.