@theautisticcoach@actuallyautistic
Any the balance of disability vs a benefit will be different for every autistic. For those whose autistic obsession has allowed them to be successful its probably seen a lot more as a good thing than someone who its been endless struggles with no successes, for example. But even those who its enabled them to be a success can have experienced the disability side of it too.
@theautisticcoach
Yes, I know, there's that self-proclaimed coach thing again, but I would prefer not to keep running into strangers who want to tell me what I am without being asked. You are not my coach. Please don't use the actuallyautistic push mechanic for your self-promotion, thanks. @actuallyautistic
@theautisticcoach
that was possibly too unspecific, because I understand that promotion for your coaching should of course go to the target group.
And I also like many of your profound questions and discussion posts here. (Which is why I would hate to mute you).
What actually bothers me is the unsolicited "trial coaching" in passing. It's like a piece of cake being pushed into my mouth in front of a bakery without being asked.
1/2 @actuallyautistic
@theautisticcoach
In the "actuallyautistic" context, I would like to have equal contact with other autistic people and no motivational sermons in the morning, which I have never asked for. If I wanted that, I would follow you.
This just to explain my point of view.
You are of course free to find this interesting or irrelevant.
Others may have a different opinion, which I will be happy to listen to.
I did suggest to Matthew that he create his own hashtag to use in these posts. That way those who are interested could follow it and those who are not could filter it.
I'm in the latter category though, like you, I don't want to mute Matthew because I am interested in engaging with some of the other stuff he posts.
@ratcatcher@danimo@actuallyautistic I have taken your suggestion and began tooting questions with #AskingAutistics so that those who don’t want questions can filter them out. Perhaps I will start using #AutisticThoughts for posts such as the above. But remind that filtering those out may cause people to lose acccess to some of the material that they’re looking for
The problem with using #AskingAutistics is that this hashtag is in general use and I would not want to filter it.
My suggestion was that you should invent your own unique hashtag specific to your questions so that those of us who are not interested can filter them. To be clear, I'm not suggesting that you stop using other hashtags or stop posting to @actuallyautistic - just include a unique hashtag that can be filtered on.
@ratcatcher@actuallyautistic@danimo what is the difference between MY questions and the questions of others, though? Not trying to argue, but to understand
I suppose that because they come from a self-described coach, they appear promotional or motivational, even if that's not the intention. The fact that they are so frequent reinforces this impression. Over time, I find it irritating. Just trying to give you an honest personal view here.
On the other hand, I'm more than willing to enter into general discussion with you as a fellow member of the autistic community.
I'm also happy (as you know) to discuss other subject areas. In particular, I feel that it's important that Jewish people who don't hold stereotypical views on Israel, Palestine and Zionism should have their voices listened to and amplified by the wider community. Again, just a personal view.
Thanks for taking the time to respond, it’s much appreciated.
Everything I post on the Fediverse is as part of the autistic community. The only thing that may be construed as a promotion would be my workshops, and even these, I’d argue are not, as they are pay as you can, even free. Every single one of my discussion circles and support groups are entirely free for all.
I never promote my personal coaching sessions on this platform, even though I do not believe doing such is a problem.
I am here fully and solely as a member of the community. As I have said perhaps 50+ times over the past year, my questions and posts are in no way any different than any one else’s. The opposite, in fact, the size of my platform actually makes them that much more seen. Also, it’s important to note, again, that the majority of the questions are not MINE, but questions that the community ASKS ME to ask, as a way of getting others to be seen.
As an autist with a new self-diagnosis, I appreciate these daily thoughts and the discussions that they spark with other autists. They help me to understand what I have in common with other autists and, in some cases, how to deal more successfully with the difficulties that autism can present. Matthew, I appreciate the work that you do here. Thank you!
Fed up of kept seeing of all the war toots or anything other as a reason to use the actuallyautistic group, as I'm not sure this is what the group is actually for.
I'm actually fine with his stuff about the war, though I agree he shouldn't be using the @actuallyautistic group to propagate them, as (most of) them are not related to autism.
He did agree to start using #AutisticThoughts in his "motivational" questions, but hasn't done so. I may ultimately have to (very reluctantly) mute him.
I've had matthew get picked on about this before, and I'm always sorry afterwards, but starting the day with being framed by a comrade as somehow "broken", even if the message is "you're not broken!" the framing is the same; apparently triggers me enough to bring it up occasionally.
@danimo@actuallyautistic thank you for sharing Dan, i do appreciate your reply. I am not promoting myself though. I am sharing my thoughts in the autistic experience.
I am quite confident that those who have actually met me in my 100+ discussion and support groups (all of which are free with no strings attached whatsoever) or my actual coachinf services would say that my toots and the “sermons” aren’t actually at all what I do as my work. I understand why you may think that they are indeed that, as we have not met and you have no reason to believe otherwise.
I’d be thrilled for you to join sometime and see for yourself. I hold these spaces precisely for the reason youve said - to give autistic people a space offline (sort of) to connect, shared and affirm. It’s super important.
I would be lying if I said that the constant accusations of self promotion didn’t hurt. As one of the few autistic people who works for the autistic community, mainly for free, it hurts to see be seen as anything other than that. It hurts to be accused of things like that when I’m one of the very few people offering spaces and support whatsoever. And for free, at that.
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