@theautisticcoach@actuallyautistic I don't care for disappointment. I find that a combination of setting my expectations low and by controlling the minutiae as much as possible, I can simultaneously stress myself out and ALWAYS be disappointed, regardless of how good the outcome actually is.
And then I bitch, usually a lot, until everyone that frequently comes into contact with me stops doing so.
Taking the time to understand why this thing is the way it is helps me to cope with disappointment. If I'm in an emotional state due to it, I usually have to work through those emotions first, but understanding and getting answers usually helps resolve my disappointment.
Usually, for me, disappointment comes from not having a correct expectation of something. So when I'm met with it, I remind myself that this thing is not in my sphere of control, and so I adjust my expectation, or, better yet, drop expectation altogether.
To me, it's best to let people and things be as they are and make the best of them. If they can be improved, great! But if they can't, then not having expectations for how it should be free energy to affect the things I can control.
@theautisticcoach@actuallyautistic
Most of the times it doesn’t matter. I don’t know if that’s because my compensation of the alexithymia is already gone then.
My inner perception is that I my whole self-awareness disintegrates in severe dysregulation. So I have to rebuild my inner state with what‘s there. I doesn’t seem to matter if one piece has gone missing which would have notably affected my emotions otherwise.
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