Crul,
Valmond,

Thank you!

I’ll get straight to it Monday morning!

Slovene,

And don’t forget the new coversheets for the TPS report, mmmkay? Great.

jettrscga,

Then no one looks at the report until the next Friday and then they ask for urgent changes.

alienanimals,

Alternate title: Doormat employee

Rentlar,

I can finish the report by end of next week.

Monday morning: Report has been started. It’s blank except for a date and title.

Moobythegoldensock,

Tosses paper on top of work pile, then leaves for the weekend.

SlopppyEngineer,

I just say it’ll be done by Wednesday and next time act like a professional and give some time.

Some other guy I know will get it done, book a crazy amount of overtime, mail the thing and stay home from that overtime until Thursday.

And one other guy would just call the manager at weird hours the entire weekend asking for classifications.

I know some anarchistic people, okay.

rockSlayer,

It’s fun being a corporate monkeywrencher

funkless_eck,

that’s just normal people.

“no one wants to work any more” is code for “no one wants to be blackmailed into volunteering extra time for less money”

which, no shit.

my manager gave us all a speech on how we need to work extra hard to close the year out with a bang. My dude, me working extra hard only earns you extra money (he’s C level company founder), not me.

if you want me to work extra hard, set me achievable targets properly recompensed. It’s not personal, it’s just business.

SlopppyEngineer,

It’s not personal, it’s just business.

That’s my brother. When the boss asks to do overtime he opens a spreadsheet that calculates what every hour of overtime actually puts in the bank account. It’s surprisingly low. Then he asks the boss to make it worth his time.

set me achievable targets properly recompensed

In my brother’s place they changed the end of year bonus. It’s no longer on an individual level but as a group. And the targets van change at any time. Who are they trying to fool.

I think myself, I’ll probably get the “you’re indispensable but they’re isn’t any budget for a raise” this year

QuinceDaPence,

Yeah my time off is worth more than 1.5x my pay except in very few circumstances.

I'd actually rather get 1.5x comp time instead of overtime pay. And that works out as a better deal for both of us.

Nougat,

"No."

AllonzeeLV, (edited )

This is why I won’t get anywhere in life and I see it as a badge of honor in this perverse, corrupt, nonsensical time and place in history.

You fuck with me trying to flex power, I fuck right back. You can review a blank page on monday morning I proudly present with a snarky smile declaring “here, review my progress.” because you gave me a task 10 minutes before end of day, so I set it down and won’t give it another thought until my allotted hours on Monday. Send me on unemployment vacation if you want all the custom automation I built that they lean on for everything to breakdown for about 80 employees without my maintenance procedures.

Yes, I’m salary. I set these kind of boundaries, and I love the cross pity between my try hard peers and myself. They because I don’t believe in the importance of the mission and I because they take making the rich owner richer as their life’s important mission seriously. I’m just here to grift enough to live off a more successful, more sociopathic grifter than myself: the owner.

My desktop wallpaper at work is literally a Karl Marx quote. It’s good to be the Sysadmin.

ObviouslyNotBanana,
@ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world avatar

Monday: you set me an impossible task, here’s the email where I asked for confirmation that you knew the task was impossible and here’s the one where you confirmed it. This has been the review.

winterayars,

Or: “I’m sorry I have work that needs to get done scheduled till Tuesday, I’ll be able to start on this then.”

(Edit: Better yet, give that as your report Monday morning.)

AllonzeeLV, (edited )

Yup!

When the little tin pot dictator managers come at you, it isn’t sufficient to merely ignore them. You must make a mockery of their power and shame them, or they’ll keep coming.

Everywhere I’ve worked, I’m in with the minority of real people that don’t drink the corpo Kool-aid, and I make it a point to perform my job skills very well, but make any managers or supervisors that prove uncool recoil at the thought of engaging with me.

It’s sport to me at this point. American Employers set these terms. If they put employees and customers first as was once the case until private shareholders rigged the system, it would be different. Game on greedy motherfuckers and class traitors.

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