i mean just because something is a social construct doesn’t mean it has no real effects on people lives or importance in society. money is a social construct too, but it still affects people and society in major ways, and can be an extremely useful tool.
personally, i think that gender is a useful concept to describe a difficult to quantify/describe part of a persons being, and the majority of people identify with some aspect of gender in some way in their lives. because of that, imo, it’s a good word that should be kept around
finished my last final yesterday, so it’s all smooth sailing from here on to January! excited to kick back, hang out with some friends, and try to enjoy the holidays. also happy i finally have time to game- been looking at baldurs gate and slay the spire, but i didn’t want that kind of distraction during my term :)
I know this is more fitted for the mental health community on lemmy.world, but that community feels like shouting in the void. I want to have a more “normal” talk about like life, death, purpose, and stuff. How do y’all not just get consumed by how you will be gone one day, how one day no one in the world will even...
to preface this, i just want to say i don’t have any mental illnesses or disorders or anything, and so, if you do, this might not help at all. this is just my own perspective on life.
i’ve never personally been very caught up in the whole our lives are meaningless, we are only a minor blip in time, nothing matters in the end, we are tiny and inconsequential in the grand scheme of things, etc. i think i used to care somewhat, but i sort of just realized at some point that, even if we don’t matter “overall”, that doesn’t mean our lives don’t matter at all.
it doesn’t particularly matter to me that one day i’ll be dead and forgotten, because, well, i’m not dead and forgotten right now. right now i’m alive and experiencing things and have people who care about me. why should it matter that, in 100 years or so, i’ll be dead? why should that take away from the very real life/experiences/memories i have right now?
same idea with size/scale related thoughts. we are tiny on a cosmic scale, our lives don’t matter because of how inconsequential they are, etc. but like… the only thing i have is my life and experiences. why should it matter to me what’s important on a “cosmic scale”? if it’s not concerned with me, i quite frankly don’t see why it should concern me either.
i feel you, i burn way easy. last time i even applied sunscreen and didn’t even go swimming or anything :/ no clue if i just have to remember to reapply it or what, but it’s a total pain haha. hope you’re feeling better soon!
pretty good so far! have a couple hangouts scheduled with friends, some important paperwork to do that i’ve been slacking on, and a camping trip this weekend! also i’m pretty excited for all that. and i’ve been getting some time to work on my jacket project, which makes me very happy.
thanks! it’s just a black denim jacket i thrifted and have been “upgrading” in a way haha. sewing pockets on the inside, making and putting on some handmade patches for bands i like, embroidering on it, that kind of thing :) im not sure how to link an album, but here’s a (slightly outdated) pic of it so far! nothing on the back though quite yet
though not as home oriented as most posters here, i have a denim jacket i’ve been working on for the past couple months. have been making and sewing my own patches on, and am currently looking at dyeing the sleeves, though i’ve been procrastinating from that a bit ;)
If this turns out to be good I’m gonna keep it in my back pocket for the next time I have a psych patient who really likes to creatively write (…and is also not actively detached from reality LOL)...
Mythic Greek World Rescue Fierce Barbarian Serial Killer Eager Apprentice Androids
trying to find a way to work all these components together (especially the androids) is an interesting thought process, though i think having them be divinely powered is what i’m leaning towards. like, no one knows how they work, and so they kind of revere them.
for the rescue plot, i think the eager apprentice sounds like the right one to need rescuing. too eager, not careful enough maybe. captured by serial killer i suppose, who could be an android for extra funsies, and the barbarian main character gets to go save them. probably all while realizing/coming to terms with the fact that they actually DO like the apprentices company and miss them, despite finding them very annoying in the beginning.
i think it’s a cool idea and gets you to stretch some creative muscles with connecting some unrelated ideas and imagining what a story involving these elements might be like :)
been considering making a proper fursona recently, but i’m not sure what species(‘s) to pick. how did you pick yours? did it have to do with aesthetics, personality, or some kind of connection to that animal? all three? tell your story :)
same! i’m thinking probably just some kind of basic domestic cat, though maybe something bigger, just because i’ve pretty much always liked cats. i don’t find myself particularly relating to to their stereotypes though, which makes me a little hesitant, but it really shouldn’t matter should it.
Probably never gonna get around to it, knowing myself.
honestly though 😭 i completely relate. i’ve been “thinking” about this for like 3 years at this point hahaha
damn, this is so whimsical and i love it. i wish i had an experience like this to help me lol, but i’ll probably just go with a cat since i’ve always liked them ¯_(ツ)_/¯
having only been introduced to the topic as of this post, i think it’s an interesting point of view, though overall i might have to disagree with it’s ideology.
i think that, what with all of the hate directed at the furry community primarily for its sexual nature, it’s natural that some furries who are younger and newer to the community would want to distance themselves from that aspect of it. whether that be out of personal disgust or wanting the approval of others i’m sure varies from person to person, but overall i can understand having that perspective when one is younger and both less sure of themselves in regards to their involvement with the community and in general.
overall though, i think that creating divisions in the furry community is not going to help anyone. we should keep out genuine zoophiles, but differentiating between what kind of yiff is acceptable and unacceptable is never going to get us anywhere. and, if these peoples intention is to be one of “the good ones” i don’t think that people who hate on furries aren’t going to spare them just because that person hold this view.
things are in fact going extremely badly but we’ll see if they pick up starting tomorrow night for reasons that will preclude me being here for about a week (seeing my SO)
i’ve been playing a khajiit in my current run through and have been really heavy on the rp, using khajiit speak mods and such. khajiit likes this, [character name] wants that, “this one”, the works. it’s gotten bad enough that i’ve caught myself almost replying to people in real life with khajiit speak rather than using “i” pronouns on multiple occasions 💀💀
honestly. i’m still stuck to reddit because of the content only, and if i found a suitable alternative for that niche i’d finally be free to leave. i hate reddit- i hate the app, the “features”, the admins, all of that, but i LOVE the content itself
like i said, niche interest. i still browse reddit, but it really is only 1-2 subs i spend time on now, really just the one. as soon as battlejackets become an interest with my fellow lemmiers (??), i’ll be out- but that’ll probably never happen lol.
the content in larger subs has gotten significantly worse. like i said, i only really browse a niche hobby sub, and the content there has remained just as good as ever.
i think that most people here (myself included) really like that lemmy is so small, though i can see why it could feel like a problem to fix. it doesn’t have the advantages of infinite content like other services do, but the smallness means anyone here really wants to be here and is interested in discussion. it’s tight knit! i feel like people who actively want a reddit alternative have searched and already heard about lemmy, and i wouldn’t exactly want the general user base to be here considering how bad they can be haha.
I’m quite young, but personally—I spent most of my childhood thinking a crush was just “friendship I’m embarrassed to want to continue,” so I avoided befriending girls I had “crushes” on just because I thought me doing so would be creepy or clingy. Later on, in high school, I didn’t like that I hardly had friends...
excuse my ignorance again, but how would monitoring software use in real time be different than how they currently monitor it? what would it really entail? serving more accurate ads and collecting/selling that more invasive type or information?
i haven’t looked into privacy much prior to joining lemmy, so i’m not very knowledgeable, but i’m very interested in learning more about it.
Some experimentation in Blender that way overboard. The final render time ended up being 13 and a half hours. I wanted to add more detail to the scene and clean a few things up, but my computer simply couldn’t handle any more. Oh well, I’m not entirely unhappy with the result....
I caught myself loads of times scrolling on Reddit while not even paying attention, or while scrolling on Reddit to then close it immediately opening Reddit again to continue scrolling....
maybe less, though i’ve also been spending less time on social media like that lately anyways. though i do like lemmy, reddit has a lot more content in general and subs for my more niche interests (mostly battlejackets), so i do find myself scrolling there a fair amount. it tends to be a more conscious decision though, which is good, and i tend to stick to only a few subs that i really like. less mindless scrolling, more hunting for inspiration and conversation.
i think the one person in the article makes a good point about how this sort of thing can make it more difficult for lgbt people actually living in malaysia, but overall i’d say i think that this is a super great thing overall. it’s ridiculous and terrible how intolerant and stuck in the past some countries are.
agreed. imo cishet men (especially white men) tend to have their problems completely overlooked and invalidated by our community just because they are comparatively privileged, but that’s not right. they absolutely do have problems they have to deal with too, plenty of which are from the patriarchy, and i think that just talking to him about what he’s feeling is totally the best way to go about this.
well, i disagree. i’m not trying to claim cishet white men are oppressed, i never said that, and people who do are flat out wrong. i’m just saying that, because of their privilege (which i’m agreeing they obviously do have), their problems with things like mental health are heavily overlooked and dismissed. men suffer from expectations related to toxic masculinity and the patriarchy. sexual assault against men gets laughed at and joked about, it’s not acceptable for men to show emotions or cry, and in this society men need to be strong all the time. even small things like how men should pay for dinner on a date or hold the car door open are unfair expectations placed on men alone.
i am not trying to say that men have issues comparable to poc or lgbt folks. i’m just saying that what men go through are real problems that need to be validated, not brushed off. being brushed off is exactly what drives men to incel forums- no one else will sympathize with their struggles whatsoever. we need to be better at this.
i don’t follow. that doesn’t mean all of them are terrible? i’m sure all the men who feel like they can’t talk to anyone about their problems like sexual assault, suicidal thoughts, and unfair expectations from a patriarchal society are really comforted by the thought that it’s people just like them that cause others unbelievable suffering. that’ll really boost their spirits!
Reddit is removing its current coins and awards system on September 12th. Users will no longer be able to buy awards like Reddit Gold to give to other users’ posts. Reddit says the current awards system is too cluttered and confusing, so they plan to introduce a new simpler system in the coming months that will allow users to...
just bi. imo terms like pan and omni don’t fulfill the criteria to be a “good label”* well enough for me to adopt- omni is not well known at all, and pan is too confusing what with all its different definitions. with pan especially, i find that i need to ask every individual who uses it exactly what they mean when they use it, since everyone says something different (regardless of genders, all genders, etc.) which is just too much hassle compared to the very well known bi.
*just my opinion for labels, idrc if others use omni or pan but for me at least i think the whole purpose of a label is to convey a concept to others quickly and easily
I encountered someone saying, “I have no problems with a person’s sexual orientation and choice, I have a problem with anyone being openly sexual or flaunting their sexuality in front of me regardless of their choice of orientation.”...
i think this is a great discussion topic, thank you for bringing it up! i should preface this also by saying that my perspective comes from that of a sex averse/repulsed asexual- so in both real life and tv/books/fiction, i get uncomfortable by sexual topics generally speaking. this does extend to some forms of PDA for couples of all orientation as well, though i should clarify that i have no issue with what consenting adults do in their homes, as that is not my business.
others have already pointed out that the exact phrase you included tends to unfairly target queer people, so i will touch on it as though it were being equally applied to straight and queer people. if others being sexual in public makes you uncomfortable, there is nothing wrong with staying in that mindset in my opinion, especially if it is your comfort zone as is. while moving out of it could be personally beneficial if possible (not being uncomfortable is more pleasant than being uncomfortable), it’s not morally wrong to be uncomfortable. don’t let anyone make you believe otherwise.
while passing judgement on others for being sexual in public is a separate topic, and one many here would say is immoral, idk how to feel. i really try not to judge others for PDA, but if it’s like, really intense… i think it’d be lying to say i don’t judge others at all for it. but i don’t think that’s objectively morally wrong or something, i just have my own quiet opinions and keep them to myself. that’s okay too.
i understand what you mean, it makes sense to me that something like that wouldn’t necessarily be considered allosexuality if the individual doesn’t actually want to have sex with the person. i think i just don’t see the purpose of differentiation at a point- for example a sex favourable person who both gets aroused by their partner and actively seeks out and enjoys sex on a regular basis could feasibly be labelled as asexual within this community, and i feel like that would be a very misleading term to use to describe them. (not saying that’s the commenter you were talking to, just an example.)
(this isn’t meant to be taking anything out on you or the other commenter by any means, i’m just venting a bit.) i think i might just be personally frustrated by having so many people fall under the “asexuality umbrella” who live relatively normal lives in regards to sex and relationships, while i’m a rather sex repulsed ace. i feel like with the label being so broad and inclusive it’s like i need to find something else to call myself- i’d be really uncomfortable if someone heard me say “asexual” to describe myself and think i’d be interested in sex at all, but that’s really what the label has been coming to and idk how to feel about it.
i really appreciate this response! i wasn’t expecting you to be understanding, since expressing sentiments like this get people even banned on certain subr*ddits, so it’s refreshing. especially because most people tend to be very one way or the other- either us “real” asexuals experience no sexual attraction whatsoever and everyone else is allo, or absolutely anybody who experiences slightly abnormal attraction is asexual. the nuance of “yes i acknowledge graysexuals and such are real and also need support groups, but saying they are specifically asexual feels like it’s muddying the meaning of the label” is very much where i lie and i like getting to have others who agree :)
i do agree that sex favourable aces get fair use for the term and need support for their unique struggles as well. being sexually attractive to your partner is an understandable necessity in relationships for some, and not being able to provide that for your partner or make them feel desired in that way sounds difficult. though i admit i do find it kind of annoying when people get mad at others online for assuming asexual means no sex, though i understand where they’re coming from.
i think the biggest issue that comes with the broadness of the label is that those like me- sex repulsed aces- oftentimes feel unsafe or uncomfortable in asexual spaces, which is a true shame. on top of that, it is exceedingly difficult (speaking from experience) to find exclusively sex repulsed spaces, even when actively searching for them. i don’t struggle so much anymore with being sex repulsed, but in the past it’s been very difficult to deal with, and i haven’t been able to find nearly as much support as you’d think in popular ace communities.
i agree with a lot of what you’ve said :) thank you for sharing
The question on everyone's mind. (comicpress.socksandpuppets.com)
This comic is the third installment in a three-part joke. Here are the first one, and the second one
Gender isn't real: it's just an idea (sopuli.xyz)
cross-posted from: sopuli.xyz/post/6893359
how's your week going, Beehaw
just finished part one of my latest big project. not much to report; this has kept me very busy for the past week and change
How do y'all manage to not be in an existential crisis all the time? I feel like I'm in a warzone even though it's peacetime in my country. [Trigger Warning for depression, existential stuff, etc.]
I know this is more fitted for the mental health community on lemmy.world, but that community feels like shouting in the void. I want to have a more “normal” talk about like life, death, purpose, and stuff. How do y’all not just get consumed by how you will be gone one day, how one day no one in the world will even...
some art I made for me and my gf Kara (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
Seaside 🦌 (pawb.social)
I made this a couple of days ago as part of a little experiment, really liked the result!
How's your week going?
Keeping the weekly post warm until @alyaza comes back 🙂...
(August) What are you working on now, DIY? (beehaw.org)
Making any progress, you slackers? Tell us about it!
Test this randomized creative writing/world-building exercise for me?
If this turns out to be good I’m gonna keep it in my back pocket for the next time I have a psych patient who really likes to creatively write (…and is also not actively detached from reality LOL)...
how did you choose your fursona species?
been considering making a proper fursona recently, but i’m not sure what species(‘s) to pick. how did you pick yours? did it have to do with aesthetics, personality, or some kind of connection to that animal? all three? tell your story :)
Weekly Discussion: How should the furry fandom react to "puritan" reformists? Are these reformists too aggressive and hateful? Do they have a point?
I’m happy to open our second weekly discussion topic:...
Trans youth are significantly more likely to attempt suicide when gender dysphoria is met with conversion therapy than with hormone treatment (theconversation.com)
how's your week going, Beehaw
things are in fact going extremely badly but we’ll see if they pick up starting tomorrow night for reasons that will preclude me being here for about a week (seeing my SO)
Mmm... sweet skooma... (media.kbin.social)
Reddit calls for “a few new mods” after axing, polarizing some of its best (arstechnica.com)
Aromantic adults: how has your aromanticism affected your life and relationships?
I’m quite young, but personally—I spent most of my childhood thinking a crush was just “friendship I’m embarrassed to want to continue,” so I avoided befriending girls I had “crushes” on just because I thought me doing so would be creepy or clingy. Later on, in high school, I didn’t like that I hardly had friends...
Google is already pushing WEI(DRM Webpage) into Chromium (github.com)
The Summoning - 3D Art (photos.smugmug.com)
Some experimentation in Blender that way overboard. The final render time ended up being 13 and a half hours. I wanted to add more detail to the scene and clean a few things up, but my computer simply couldn’t handle any more. Oh well, I’m not entirely unhappy with the result....
do you also spend a lot less time on Lemmy compared to Reddit?
I caught myself loads of times scrolling on Reddit while not even paying attention, or while scrolling on Reddit to then close it immediately opening Reddit again to continue scrolling....
Malaysia halts music festival after same-sex kiss by UK band The 1975 (www.reuters.com)
[OC/Fanart] Doing a higher detail portrait (crystals.rest)
cross-posted from: crystals.rest/post/113230...
can anyone provide any sources to prove the bs we deal with
A friend of mine is arguing with me saying cishet men are oppressed and stuff. He thinks I’m insane for supporting the community I’m a part of
is anyone else tired of heteronormativity?
I kimd of am, why are so many relationships in media strsight? We need more lgbt representation...
Reddit is getting rid of its Gold awards system (www.theverge.com)
Reddit is removing its current coins and awards system on September 12th. Users will no longer be able to buy awards like Reddit Gold to give to other users’ posts. Reddit says the current awards system is too cluttered and confusing, so they plan to introduce a new simpler system in the coming months that will allow users to...
bi+ people, what label do you feel fits most
I prefer using omnisexual but use bi when explaining to people outside the community
Help me grow my perspective on openness and sexuality please
I encountered someone saying, “I have no problems with a person’s sexual orientation and choice, I have a problem with anyone being openly sexual or flaunting their sexuality in front of me regardless of their choice of orientation.”...
what is the difference between sexual and romantic attraction?
Are there any other terms. I’m just curious
complacency rule (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
Credit: pizzacakecomic.com