@SteveClough@metalhead.club
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SteveClough

@[email protected]

Christian Quaker, software developer, anarchist, Green, and many other things I am not very good at.

He/Him. Also respond to it/Oi/Shut up you idiot.

Header image: Seascape sunset.
Avatar: A cat above a message that says "Schroedingers cat is " and then an image with the words "alive" and "dead" combined.

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

SteveClough, to bookstodon
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Someone on @bookstodon was asking for books of the year. I always struggle with this - remembering, but also, books may have had a profoud meaning for me that I have then absorbed into my understanding.

However, two I will highlight:

Flowers for Algernon.
The Opposite of Butterfly Hunting (currently reading). I will say more on this when I have finished it, but it is quite superb.

SteveClough,
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@bookstodon Oh - it was @kimlockhartga on @bookstodon who started this. I should have known.

SteveClough, to bookstodon
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I have started reading "The Death and Life of Schneider Wrack". I think the opening descriptions are some of the best portayals of hell I have read. If you want some real, gruelling horror.

It is a little bit Moby Dick and Zombies. Told from the perspective of a Zombie. What better recommendation could you have.

@bookstodon

Tim_McTuffty, to actuallyautistic
@Tim_McTuffty@beige.party avatar

Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 35 Sunday 3/12/23

TL:DR A day of 2 halves, a day where my relationship with my father changed forever.
This is not an easy read - peruse at your own risk.

Up at 4 as usual , chatted with CDP 🧚‍♀️ ,then this old squirrel fell back to sleep - it being Sunday n all

My Dad and sister were due over today so my Dad could complete the ASD assessment Informants questionnaire.
We had some unexpected snow so a quick conflab with the parent & we agreed that the visit should be ok.
Tidying up the house , getting washed / changed took up the morning then headed out early because of the snow.

We met at one of our favourite eateries & had a delicious lunch , I had my first turkey dinner of the season & it was delicious.

The drive back was mildly interesting due to the white fluffy stuff but nothing too serious.

We topped my Dad up with a cuppa & biscuits & presented him with the questionnaire - all 16 pages of it !
I emphasised that it needed to be as thorough as possible because a ASD diagnosis can be difficult without childhood details.

About an hour later he finished .
My sister & my Dad left about 4pm to get home before the snow got heavy again. We said our goodbyes etc & they were gone.

I then read thru the answers my Dad have put down …
17/47 questions had no answers , 7 were ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answers to open questions.
Apparently the only thing he remembered of me as a baby was that I didn’t sleep well.
Apparently my only strengths as a person are : IT Work & Computer gaming !

I wasn’t expecting war & peace but the total lack of information in answers that ranged from my birth to the present day, via my pre-teen & teenage years was disappointing to say the least.

I am gonna have to approach other family members to see if they can pad this out!

We’re watching Fargo, for about the 4th time, it’s moderately amusing & involves a lot of snow …. hey there are worst ways to pick a movie!

Mixed nuts & alcohol are helping me cope with being such an important part of my Fathers life that in answer to the question “Can they feel empathy” was blank.

Final Thoughts:

I realise that I have not been a model son, I am no great academic , artist , musician or physician. Shit I can barely hold my own in the IT world. I had thought that my own low opinion of myself was just me , but it appears that my father has an equally low opinion of me, so much so that I barely register.

My diagnosis has suddenly become much less likely, since childhood details are fairly key apparently!

I am Squirrel, because being human is far too fecking hard !

Thanks to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you ! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖

@actuallyautistic

SteveClough,
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@Tim_McTuffty @actuallyautistic This is difficult. I wonder if he also is autistic - and finds it difficult to communicate because of this?

It is of no use to you, of course, but it might be him not you that has the problems.

Not that you don't have problems. You are a squirrel, after all.

SteveClough,
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@Tim_McTuffty @actuallyautistic Oh I wouldn't suggest it to him. Just for your understanding.

If you can see it isn't really his fault, then it might help you see it as an issue to be solved, not the fault of either side.

SteveClough,
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@Tim_McTuffty @actuallyautistic I suspect - with no evidence at all* - that he might also struggle to fill it out honestly. It might prove to be over-positive there.

"Oh yes she was walking at 2 weeks, and conversing on phenomenology by 6 weeks. Strengths: They are the greatest living human."

*Everyone else is doing it, so why not.

SteveClough,
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@Tim_McTuffty @actuallyautistic She clearly got the brains then.

6 weeks to congratulate you is ridiculous. Maybe - and this is just a possibility - he is a dick.

Although he gave the world Dr Sister and you, so he has contributed some good.

Tim_McTuffty, to actuallyautistic
@Tim_McTuffty@beige.party avatar

Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 34 Saturday 2/12/23

TL:DR I am a truly socially impaired entity, I am thankful that I have really good & close friends to help me with this. (If that is not an oxymoron! ) ; I fear that spoons are soon to become a big part of my life. ; I am starting to understand that this journey I am on is many faceted , complex and Andrex™ long! ; Downton Abbey is still brilliant !

Today started early, as my days now do with an early morning cuppa and a chat with my Bestie.

Breakfast was had & Mrs Squirrel went to do the weekly shopping run .

I played No Mans Sky in co-op mode for the 1st time with the Cheeky Dutch Pixy who has been kind enough to introduce me to co-op gaming.
The experience was disrupted when an old Playstation Friend of CDPs joined us & my ASD triggered like a bomb going off ! I shrank away from both the new comer & my friend. I came close to turning off the playstation , but settled for flying off to the far side of the planet & changing all the privacy settings.
I fear that I may have scared my friend with some of the the things that I did & said, not that they were terribly terrible, but I am aware that my friend has her own battle with ASD (or ASS as it is in the Netherlands) & that was never my intention , but I had no real control over my reaction. I sincerely hope that a) CDP 🧚‍♀️ will forgive me & b) that in time I will learn tools & techniques to help me deal with such things.

A friend on Mastodon spoke of spoons, & the disconnect between the apparent & physical levels of exhaustion felt by some ND folk. I don’t know if this is a thing for me. I know that I never feel fully refreshed by sleep , but is that just me ?

This afternoon was a quiet one, a few chores & then a Downton Abbey double bill, with chinese takeaway & cider in the intermission.
Watching Downton Abbey: New Era , Violet has just died & my sentimental side is in full flow 😭, I’m such a soft squirrel on the quiet!

Final Thoughts:

The full force of my Social Interaction Impairment element of the ASD Triad hit me like a spade in the face today, the force & speed of the trigger was, in retrospect , quite scary.

The idea of ‘having enough spoons’ was raised again, I have yet to fully understand this concept & wether it applies to me.

When I started my ASD journey I’m not sure I fully understood what I would encounter & what I would learn along the way. This is intriguing, fascinating & frightening almost in equal measure !

Thanks to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you ! 😊🫶🐿️🖖

@actuallyautistic

SteveClough,
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@Tim_McTuffty @actuallyautistic Spoon theory is a really good way to understand how we cope with life.

SteveClough,
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@ScottSoCal @Tim_McTuffty @actuallyautistic I think people use it differently and in ways that they find works, but the basic concept is still there, I think.

So yes, a battery makes sense too.

ExcessivelyDiverting, to bookstodon
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SteveClough,
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@JoelBarr @ExcessivelyDiverting @bookstodon Agree. I mean Beren and Luthien is one of the great love stories.

KrisBock, to bookstodon
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Quiz: which member of the Thursday Murder Club are you?: 47% - You are mainly Joyce! "You are the heart of the group. You’re the glue that keeps everyone together, and your disarming friendliness can help open doors that would otherwise be firmly locked." https://penguin.co.uk/articles/2023/11/quiz-which-member-thursday-murder-club-richard-osman @bookstodon

SteveClough,
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@KrisBock @bookstodon 40% Joyce, but 27% Ibraham. I'll take it.

theautisticcoach, to actuallyautistic
@theautisticcoach@neurodifferent.me avatar

Do you use the word "Neurodivergent"?

Why or why not?

Do you think it's ableist?

If you don't use it, what word do you use?

#ActuallyAutistic #AskingAutistics @actuallyautistic

SteveClough,
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@theautisticcoach @actuallyautistic I don't like it, because it feels too general. Because everybody's neuro-processes are different.

I am autistic. But I also acknowledge that this is quite a broad diagnosis too. It covers a range of experiences that are different for different people.

But it feels like it at least restricts the divergence.

chestas, to bookstodon
@chestas@aus.social avatar

I've just seen the Netflix series All The Light We Cannot See, based on the novel by Anthony Doerr which is sitting on my bookcase. It has tempted me to read and/or reread some novels based in WWII.

Does anyone have any recommendations of novels based historically in or around WWII?

@bookstodon

SteveClough,
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@chestas @jake @bookstodon It is next but one on my physical TBR pile. For a reread.

SteveClough, to bookstodon
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I am onto a third level cache in my TBR pile.

That is, I have a TBR pile, and am now uto my 3rd level of next piles.

@bookstodon

SteveClough,
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@MaJ1 @bookstodon It is dark and cold and miserable. ANd that is just outside.

Wife has has a lurgy, so I might end up with that too.

How are you - are you all recovered from your lurgy?

SteveClough,
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@Pierrette @MaJ1 @bookstodon Oh excellent - sort of.

It is good that you have learnt a new word.

NickEast, to writing
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SteveClough,
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@NickEast @writers @writingcommunity @writing @humour The kid was probably right..

ChrisMayLA6, to bookstodon
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This week I've been mainly reading, no. 108.

Ave Barrera's The Forgery (2013/2022) is a Mexican caper story about an forced to complete a forgery as part of an inheritance fraud. But by the end its unclear (perhaps purposefully) whether the narrator has experienced imprisonment & exploitation by a violent & rich mastermind, or whether its all a fever dream brought on by a hand injury (turning to sepsis). While quite enjoyable its also finally unsatisfying as a novel.

@bookstodon

SteveClough,
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@muirinnmac @ChrisMayLA6 @bookstodon I think novels need to have endings - happy or not. They need to finish the story they are telling.

They can hint at more stories. They can make it clear that there is more than we have read. But the story being told needs to conclude.

And that is from me who loved The Gamekeeper by Barry Hines, which ends where it starts - because life is cyclic like that. It at least finishes.

kimlockhartga, to bookstodon
@kimlockhartga@beige.party avatar

You know the drill, @bookstodon Whatcha reading this weekend? ❤📚👀

I finished WE ARE THE CRISIS, the excellent second installment of Cadwell Turnbull's Convergence Saga. NO GODS, NO MONSTERS was the first book.

I'm currently reading Ed Park's bizarro SAME BED DIFFERENT DREAMS.

Next up: THE FUTURE, by Naomi Alderman, author of THE POWER.

SteveClough,
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@Cheery @kimlockhartga @bookstodon Do you like Nesbo? I read The Snowman, and found it very predictable.
So haven't been encouraged to try others.

nithou, to bookstodon
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Wow started reading The Ministry of the Future and damn, quite depressing after 15% 😭 @bookstodon

SteveClough,
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@nithou @bookstodon Yeah, it is. It does become less unremittingly depressing.

I can hardly say cheerful.

appassionato, to bookstodon
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Language, Thought and Reality
Selected Writings of Benjamin Lee Whorf

The pioneering linguist Benjamin Whorf (1897–1941) grasped the relationship between human language and human thinking: how language can shape our innermost thoughts. His basic thesis is that our perception of the world and our ways of thinking about it are deeply influenced by the structure of the languages we speak.

@bookstodon



SteveClough,
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@appassionato @bookstodon I mean, we interpret the world around us based on an internal model. So HOW that model is build and maintained will always impact out interpretation.

Some of that is linguistic. Of course, not entirely. But our language model will impact our world model, to an extent.

SteveClough, to bookstodon
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So i have just finished reading At The Existentialist Cafe. It is a really good book covering existentialism and phenomenology and the various ideas around it.

If this is your sort of interest, then it is worth a read. It is the stories of half a dozen of the main philosophers of this, and their interactions, so you get something more than reading each of them.

@bookstodon

18+ historyshapes, to bookstodon
@historyshapes@mastodon.social avatar

Another excerpt from The History Shapes Cookbook, out now:

https://www.historyshapes.com/sheep-penis/

24 pages, full color, with bonus facts and brand new illustrations. Pay what you want ❤️

https://buy.stripe.com/28o03534y39sfMQfYZ

Boosts (so very much) appreciated 🙏

@histodons @bookstodon

18+ SteveClough,
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@historyshapes @histodons @bookstodon "Wash the penis" you bet.

"Do not overstuff the penis" good idea in many areas of life.

SteveClough,
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@Five Oh good.

What he means is that being found out for lying will impact how much people believe him.

Well no shit Sherlock.

CultureDesk, to bookstodon
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Ever dreamed of spending a vacation surrounded by books? Gladstone's Library may be your dream destination. It's the U.K.'s only residential library and has 26 bedrooms, 150,000 books, and several book-lined reading rooms with desks and armchairs where you can read, study and write (in the past decade, more than 300 books have been worked on there). Emily Monaco wrote about staying there for BBC Travel.

https://flip.it/63EfGo

@bookstodon

SteveClough,
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@CultureDesk @bookstodon A residential library - you would never get me out.

I mean - never.

pivic, to bookstodon
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I've started reading Naomi Klein's 'Doppelganger', an interesting look both inside oneself and into one's 'shadow self'.

Klein is a highly skilled writer and teacher.

https://bookrastinating.com/book/475951/s/doppelganger

#NaomiKlein #reading #NonFiction #fiction #JoseSaramago @bookstodon #book

SteveClough,
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@pivic @BadExampleMan @bookstodon Klein is one of my heros - a really good writer, who does the work to understand and then to clarify.

I will have to put this one on my list.

BonnettsBooks, to bookstodon
@BonnettsBooks@mastodonbooks.net avatar

10/17/23 Open 6-9p. No open containers, please.

Now that Monday has been cast out, here are 2 books to help exorcise other evils. One supposes that "demons" are really aliens and we should seek to communicate, rather than expel them. The other seems to presume that only women can be demon-possessed. Maybe that's why Stephen King's famous fictional Fury was "Christine", instead of Carson.

#BonnettsBooks #DaytonOhio #BrickAndMortar #UsedBookStore #Exorcism #Sexism #AlienBeings #ETs
@bookstodon

SteveClough,
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GelatDeTramussos, to bookstodon Catalan
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Currently reading an inspector Harry Hole novel, by #jonesbo. It's the third I read in a row.
Speaking of this... Do you binge read books till you finish the entire series or you'd rather read other things in between?
#bookstodon @bookstodon

SteveClough,
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@GelatDeTramussos @bookstodon I alternate a series. Then sometimes I alternate the alternates.

But I tend not to binge, because I need one to go down and settle before another.

azforeman, to bookstodon
@azforeman@mastodon.social avatar

Things are getting funny on the other site. Like, what the hell did I just read?

"any engagement with texts that isn't an erotic relation"

I'm like, sir, has the papercut on your dick still not healed from when you tried to fuck the books? Is that what's going on here?

@bookstodon

SteveClough,
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@orionkidder @azforeman @bookstodon He is. I mean I love books - because I love reading them. Because i love learning from them, or having my imagination stretched. Or just having new ideas.

It is not an erotic relationship. It is a deply emotional relationship.

And one that (for me) needs the physical books around, to hold the key to the memories. If you take a book away, you are taking a part of me away.

ramblingreaders, to bookstodon
@ramblingreaders@toot.community avatar

Do you know there's a alternative to Amazon-owned ? is a social network for tracking your reading, writing reviews, and discovering what to read next. You can follow and interact with users on different instances and on . You can import from a Goodreads CSV export. You can create private shelves and curated lists. Join us at https://ramblingreaders.org or choose one of the other instances available @bookstodon

SteveClough,
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@danialbehzadi @Hawkwinter @diazona @ramblingreaders @bookstodon Well the simple definition is that the source is open and available. So you can see everything the ode is doing.

There are usually restrictions on usage - I write proprietary software, and there are sometimes conditions that mean any usage has to be open source too - which is a pain.

But you have the source, so you can change it - but probably not then claim it is the original.

It is all very fraught.

DocCarms, to bookstodon
@DocCarms@mstdn.social avatar

There was a poll that stated—Rowling’s opening line in the HP series is one of best in the world. Someone posted about how there are a bunch of other opening statements that are better.

Here’s one of my personal favorites, from Gabriel Garcia Marquez (English translated):
“It is inevitable. The scent of bitter almonds always reminded him of the fate of unrequited love.”

What are some of your favorite opening lines in literature? 😊
@bookstodon

SteveClough,
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@Greenseer @DocCarms @bookstodon A good book - very deep and esoteric book that makes you think.

I do love Eco. His writing is so - grown up.

SteveClough,
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@Greenseer @DocCarms @bookstodon I have read some of his academic material as well, and it really helps to see his entire world view.

mori, to bookstodon
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@derpoltergeist @Grizzlysgrowls @ukaunz @bookstodon @philip_cardella @wordstitcher @hawksquill Yep, same here. Being an Aussie, I’ve only ever heard the phrase mother-in-law, as the mother of your significant other. Never as dwelling. But it’s always great learning a new phrase, and sometimes the potential mischief inherent in its usage.😉

SteveClough,
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@elysegrasso @diazona @mori @derpoltergeist @Grizzlysgrowls @ukaunz @bookstodon @philip_cardella @wordstitcher @hawksquill

What a fascinating discussion. I guess it is similar in concept to the "Dowager House" that large estates would have.

Or a Granny Flat in a wide sense - which can be at least paritally integrated with the rest of the house.

laminda, to bookstodon
@laminda@mastodon.social avatar

If you recently learned that your book (or books) were used without your knowledge or consent to train AI, here's what you can do next, according to the Authors Guild (which has already filed a class action suit against OpenAI, representing more than a dozen writers).

https://authorsguild.org/news/you-just-found-out-your-book-was-used-to-train-ai-now-what/

@bookstodon

SteveClough,
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@ErikJonker @laminda @bookstodon I think the answer is no. You own A COPY of the book, but the content. So using that for your own purposes is not justified.

Some time ago, I bought a piece of original art, because I wanted to use it on my book cover. The artists was fine with that, but I asked - because even the ownership of an original piece of art does not give me the right to reproduce it for my own gain (AFAIK).

SteveClough,
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@maartenpelgrim @ErikJonker @laminda @bookstodon Fair Use: Where you are allowed to use an extract of a published work (not all of it or even a subsstantial amout of it) with a reference to the original.

All of which is about using other works and guiding people to those original ones in preference if you want more detail, or to confirm the quote or implication is acurate.

SteveClough,
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@maartenpelgrim @ErikJonker @laminda @bookstodon And I think the problem is that LLM might not properly represent the original.

So I might say "Einstein said that E = mc^2" - and refer to his paper.

An LLM might - quite easily - misrepresent this - saying that Einstein said e = mc, for example, whih matches the correct structure, but an academc reference implies that I have read the original, and understood it. LLM doesn;t do this.

SteveClough,
@SteveClough@metalhead.club avatar

@ErikJonker @maartenpelgrim @laminda @bookstodon LLM as a tool to organise thoughts etc is fine (as a general rule, it is good for that - building a structure of what your answer/paper should look like). The problem comes if the source material you feed into an LLM is used elsewhere - if it is passed to the LLM owner, for training the LLM process (as they mostly are)

Then you and the LLM have probably violated copyright - albeit unwittingly on your part.

SteveClough,
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@ErikJonker @maartenpelgrim @laminda @bookstodon I am not saying I am correct legally speaking. Just interested to explore the whole area.

I am very aware of it when I use online tools and put pieces of the company code into them for checking/comparing/whatever. I try to ensure that I am not actually leaking company IP.

And I know many people don't concern themselves with this! But I do.

SteveClough,
@SteveClough@metalhead.club avatar

@maartenpelgrim @ErikJonker @laminda @bookstodon Oh totally - but then (in academia) it is up to peer review or colleagues to pull them up on it.

That whole process works when there is a person who is taking the responsibility (and claiming - by referencing - to have read the original). When it is a database, to correct that, to even challenge that, is much harder.

KitMuse, to bookstodon
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

Okay, now I want to know if there are any academic journals devoted to speculative fiction. I know there are the anthologies like BtVS and Philosophy (or the book I have on my TBR, the Religions of Star Trek).

If there isn't, must look up what it takes to start one, because that would certainly fall under the umbrella of something I'm working on.

@bookstodon

SteveClough,
@SteveClough@metalhead.club avatar

@KitMuse @aram @electricarchaeo @bookstodon That sounds interesting, and good luck.

I tried to get a reference to Firefly into my PhD thesis, but it never made it.

HailsandAles, to random
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My shirt arrived here in the UK. Thanks @thomas I shall post a picture at some point but for now here’s some business cards

SteveClough,
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@HailsandAles @thomas A t-shirt-like package arrived today, and I was hopeful.

It was for my son instead. Oh well. Soon.

thomas, to random
@thomas@metalhead.club avatar

metalhead.club was updated to 4.1.9 ✅

(released 6 minutes ago)

This fixed various issues that have bene introduced by the recent update, such as failing translation requests.

@Kitty

SteveClough,
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@thomas @Kitty Excellent - thank you Thomas.

ChrisMayLA6, to bookstodon
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This week I've been mainly reading, no 91.

Taking the form of an extended mission message to earth from an intergalactic exploratory mission, Becky Chambers' novella, To be Taught if Fortunate (2019), is a quick read. While lacking narrative fireworks its a pleasing matter-of-fact description of space exploration & the ethical dilemmas it will encounter. While ultimately rather melancholy, it is an interesting afternoon's read if you like procedural
@bookstodon

SteveClough,
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@MattMastodon @ChrisMayLA6 @bookstodon That anchors it to our time, I guess.

DarkMatterZine, to bookstodon Japanese
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@jules @timgatewood @SteveClough @niten @betaquarii @bookstodon IMO just as defining genres is tricky, assuming a POV from a comment or two is fraught.
Like, I just reviewed a book that is sold as cosy crime/murder but I say it’s also fantasy and this is a hill I’m prepared to defend. It’s complicated.
Best not to read too much into it or anything short of an essay on the topic.

SteveClough,
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@DarkMatterZine @jules @timgatewood @niten @betaquarii @bookstodon

Genre can be decided by the reader, and can differ between readers:

I like this because it has space travel in it

I like it because it has romance

I like it because it has dream sequences

I like it because it has the word "willy" in it.

Oh sorry, that last one from my 5YO self.

SteveClough, to bookstodon Japanese
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@jules @timgatewood @niten @betaquarii @bookstodon Yes - I couldn;t think of an example, but this is one where the speculation is not science-based (really).

As with music, I maintain incredulity towards genres. They can be useful, but not if they are rigorously used to divide.

SteveClough,
@SteveClough@metalhead.club avatar

@timgatewood @jules @niten @betaquarii @bookstodon Well the genre is actually, in full, SFF - including fantasy, which most of these would be included in.

But this is why I am not a fan of genres, because it excludes some that should be included, and means that gross-genre work - which can be so incredible - is problematic.

SteveClough,
@SteveClough@metalhead.club avatar

@DarkMatterZine @timgatewood @niten @betaquarii @bookstodon Yes agree there. I have called my book "Magical Realism" because it involves magic in the real world. But it is much more fantasy/humour than literature (nobody has ever accused me of writing literature).

I guess this is the problem with a genre - so often, it is really wide. It covers radically different areas. Or it is so niche as to be the purview of one or two authors, wnd inpregnable.

niten, to bookstodon Japanese
@niten@famichiki.jp avatar

@timgatewood @betaquarii @bookstodon I’m totally out of the loop, but this suggests science fiction = speculative fiction 🤔

SteveClough,
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@niten @timgatewood @betaquarii @bookstodon Not entirely - science fiction is part of speculative fiction. Or rather, a lot of it is.

Also, there are crossovers.

I always take the view that there will be something that can be classed as sci-fi for anyone. Some niche of it that anyone who reads can find enjoyment in.

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