@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

KitMuse

@[email protected]

They/Them - One account for everything

#fantasy #ya #mystery #nonfiction #author (KitAuthor.com),

Too many interests including: #yoga, #clarinet, #podcaster

I help you connect with yourself and craft your personal stories at ChickenYogi.com

Give you tools to share your stories with the world at EponaAuthorSolutions.com | AuthorYogi.com

Follow the farm at CharmedChicken.com

#nonbinary #trans #spoonieauthor #fibromyalgia #AuDHD #ActuallyAutistic #autigender #disabled

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Susan60, to actuallyautistic
@Susan60@aus.social avatar

Thought. I have always run warm. I do feel the cold, but not as much as most people. I hate (detest?) overheated department stores. This got worse with the onset of perimenopause, & I was unable to wear jumpers for years, because I couldn’t get them off quickly enough during hot flushes, which threatened spontaneous combustion. This settled somewhat after finally going on HRT.

I’ve noticed a change since going on ADHD meds. I now wear winter pjs on a “cool” summers night, & a nightie on warmer ones & am more likely to don a jacket of an evening.

I’m wondering whether this is a consequence of the meds, & overheating is related to ADHD. #ADHD #ActuallyAutistic @actuallyautistic #Menopause #HotFlushes #WomensHealth

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@Susan60 @actuallyautistic Interesting. I always blamed my bad temperature regulation on my fibromyalgia, but my hands and feet are cold and within the past few years, if my hands get cold doing farm chores, then they HURT SO BADLY like stabby hurt. I keep the heat down and especially in my office cabin, on days like today (45ish) if I get cool and stay cool then I get stomach aches. I can't do heat at all anymore, but too cold is not good either. I'm like an M class planet, I guess.

18+ KitMuse, to actuallyautistic
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

Something I've love to dive deeper into is how many AFAB or genderqueer individuals have been dx'd with Borderline Personality Disorder rather than Autism due to their past trauma?

Yes, I know they overlap. I've done the research including getting out my "Abnormal Psych" textbook.

But I also have some personal theories and I'm curious to hear from other self dx'd autistics misdiagnosed by mental healthcare. TY

@actuallyautistic

18+ KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@GreenRoc @actuallyautistic Thank you for sharing. Congrats on finally getting an autism diagnosis!

18+ KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@arisummerland @actuallyautistic Sounds like me to to the T I wish I could have. smiles I'm older 40s, "gifted child", dx of social anxiety, general anxiety, major depression, now persistent depression, cPTSD, panic attacks, and ADHD (along with the borderline personality disorder). It's been through this community that I really feel that Autism is the right answer. If left to my own schedule/devices/plans I do great, but working full-time triggers all the diagnoses.

18+ KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@GreenRoc @actuallyautistic Thanks. I admit, considering the testing was through my college's psych program and that was a (BLEEPING) nightmare, I didn't expect much. Mostly just trying to remind myself that I'm not alone.

18+ KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@GreenRoc @actuallyautistic Thanks! Really appreciate it. Due to financials, plus living in rural Ozarks (MO/AR), I'd have to probably travel at least 4 hours to get tested and with the homestead that's just not feasible. I'll happily stay self-dx'd. Appreciate the support.

18+ KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@littlescraps @arisummerland @actuallyautistic Yep. All my emotions come out my eyes (tears). I'm very self-conscious of it even to this day. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

18+ KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@dramypsyd @actuallyautistic Thank you! Considering that Missouri State's psychology program is heavy on behaviorism, I think the misdiagnosis was just baked into the system. I should have expected it and not had hope that they'd the right thing.

KitMuse, to bookstodon
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

Fun question for #AuthorsofMastodon

If I've written a novella set a "high school" level academy, but the character is older than her classmates due to health issues keeping her out of school (so she's 17 and her classmates are 14/15)

Is this still #YA or is it #NewAdult

@bookstodon #bookstodon

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@mepurfield @bookstodon Thanks. That's what I was thinking.

KitMuse, to bookstodon
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

Now that I'm back on the writing track, realizing I'm 12K into a story I was thinking about aiming toward Kindle On one hand, that still might be a good idea to try and introduce more readers to my Musimagium world. On the other... maybe I should just release it normally when it gets longer.

I did just get a bonus though and I can't tell if I had any reads at all or not.

@bookstodon

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@weirdwriter @bookstodon Ooh, interesting. Thanks for sharing this. I really want an alternative to Vella and this looks like it might just be it.

russellmcormond, to actuallyautistic
@russellmcormond@fosstodon.org avatar

Introduction is: "Whenever I mention my feelings on ABA, someone always asks me for alternatives to ABA."

https://neurodivergentrebel.substack.com/p/alternatives-to-aba-if-not-aba-then

I really want to know why people think that is a valid question?
ABA is not about helping the person be themselves or have a better life, but to try to “convert” them to be more like other people to make those other people feel more comfortable with their beliefs.

@actuallyautistic

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@Susan60 @russellmcormond @actuallyautistic In my Learning & Memory class there was 3 pages on a couple who I think created/developed ABA and how they had great results with autistic children and so if that is the case, my guess is following psychology's need to pathologize everything, they just ran with it. Frankly, as someone who suspects I'm autistic (I ace all the assessments), it was horrific because it glorified that they "fixed" those children.

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@Susan60 @russellmcormond @actuallyautistic I should add that I'm 1 class from finishing my psychology degree (am graduating w/ religious studies degree this week) and the cirriculum at this state public university is very behaviorism based, and it was a hellish two years of pathologizing, gaslighting, and the worst of neurotypical behavior -- so I think the pain is built into ABA at this point. There is no alternative. It just needs to be smashed.

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@housepanther @Susan60 @russellmcormond @actuallyautistic Thanks! I may do that one final class after I get my MA in religious studies just to check the box (because that's going to bother me that I'm so close), but I've talked to others and it just seems to be the way the program is designed.

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@housepanther @Susan60 @russellmcormond @actuallyautistic Exactly! I admit, the one thing this program has done is push me even more firmly toward autistic & mad liberation. Like I'll keep seeing my shrinky dink for my anti-anxiety meds so I can keep to 1 panic attack a day but otherwise, I'll never seek mental health care again.

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@Susan60 @housepanther @russellmcormond @actuallyautistic Part of my problem is I live in rural MO, I can't afford anything but local which the state covers due to making less than 40K/year, and my day job boss is known by a lot of people in town. I am pretty sure my therapist knew my boss and former coworker and when I was talking about their isolationist tactics, I could tell she didn't believe these "good people" would act that way. So nope. No one local. Ever. Again.

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@housepanther @Susan60 @russellmcormond @actuallyautistic Yep, I hear you there. What I have found more than anything is I have my yoga (RYT500) and meditation (CMT 200) training, and studying yoga philosophy and buddhist philosophy -- being mindful -- learning to breathe -- I will never use the c-word ("cure") but at least now I can recognize what's going on (anxiety/meltdown/etc) and I also squish-hug the horses and cats a lot. But there isn't much kissing horsie noses can't make better.

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@punishmenthurts @housepanther @russellmcormond @actuallyautistic I think you're right, @Susan60 It sure felt like all these people just wanted to come up with a theory so they could get their name in a textbook and all these studies sure seemed to validate their beliefs. I mean I write fiction, so I know a few things about making stuff up, but that's really what most of this felt like.

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@punishmenthurts @Susan60 @housepanther @russellmcormond @actuallyautistic That's great analysis about the sciences. I was struck at the lack of rigor in testing a lot of these theories. Some person thought this might be the case. Oh look the one study we know nothing about except what this textbook tells us, says that it's true.

To take this back to ABA, my thought reading that section of the book was "did anyone ask these children if it was 'better'?" The answer, sadly, was no.

snoopy_jay, to actuallyautistic
@snoopy_jay@mastodon.world avatar

@actuallyautistic
What's the deal with "keen sense of justice"? I am not sure what it's called in English, but I keep reading that it's an autism thing and I definitely have been accused of an "exaggerated" sense of justice or having too much of it. Why do we have that?

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@poloniousmonk @marytzu @Vincarsi @FrightenedRat @punishmenthurts @snoopy_jay @HaelusNovak @actuallyautistic

However this doesn't take into account that the US poverty line is artificially deflated. This 2020 article does a good job of discussing the issues:

https://www.americanprogress.org/article/poverty-line-matters-isnt-capturing-everyone/

KitMuse, to bookstodon
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

The show has posted it's upcoming themes for 1Q 2024. If you're an author and would like to speak on one of our upcoming themes - reach out!
January - finding joy in our writing/writing what we love
February - finding comfort in our writing, feel good stories of all kinds
March - writing action and adventure

https://musecharmer.eponaauthorsolutions.com/guests/#upcoming

@bookstodon

KitMuse, to bookstodon
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

Have you written a book and would you like to promote it in December? I'm booking guests for the show and would love to chat with and promote holiday books (any winter holiday or winter-themed).

Fill out this form and choose the Write Talk Wednesday show: https://musecharmer.eponaauthorsolutions.com/guests/

The WTW show airs LIVE at 6pm central on Wednesdays.

@bookstodon

KitMuse, to actuallyautistic
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

I'm going to throw this out there and it may sound a bit controversial, but keep in mind I have nearly 20 years's experience as an entrepreneur. Is there ANYONE who works with business owners or business owners who don't just regurgitate the same allistic/neurotypical "marketing advice" that's sold all over the groups and "free offers"? Because I'm not seeing anyone doing anything different from the NTs. @actuallyautistic @actuallyautistics

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@sal @actuallyautistic @actuallyautistics Yeah, like what to post on social media, when, how to bring in clients, etc. Marketing stuff.

I can create websites, blog, podcast, etc. from dawn to dusk. It's telling people about my work that I'm sucking at. 😀

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@dricibone @actuallyautistic @actuallyautistics That actually sounds like an "engagement" question all the marketing and business "coaches" tell you to ask. So I feel like you haven't been listening.

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@sahat @actuallyautistic @actuallyautistics YES! This is a large percentage of it. I mean, people say unmask and be yourself, but when yourself is not who most people want to see/know, then it just feels wrong.

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@BZBrainz @actuallyautistic Do you have more information on the neurodivergent publishing conference? That sounds amazing and I hadn't heard of it before now.

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@BZBrainz @Adhdinos @actuallyautistic @audhd @writers Thanks. I joined the writer's group and also the discord.

sahat, to actuallyautistic
@sahat@c.im avatar

We had this weird incident with this NVC guy who stumbled into the autistic conversation. It points to a pattern that I have experienced every-wheres in the world of psychology, self help and counseling or coaching. The whole field of emotions, social interactions and standards is heavily intersectional. Listen to black women. Listen to any women. Listen to poor people. Listen to any minority, because all of us together are the minority. Any white normie male that enters the conversation should first listen. All of those techniques invented by white middleclass males are limited. They have to be. Cus they know only a tiny fraction of the universe of communication. Yet, most of the inventions we hear about, that make it to popularity and that people found careers on, are from exactly those white males. They are the ones that receive the most attention when doing something new, founding a brand or school. It's harder for anyone else to get that recognition, especially as they will cause apprehension in those who perceive them as foreign and have unconscious bias against them. It's like the blond boys who got top ranks on you tube. DON#t be fooled. There is no rule for communication, that a white dude has invented and that everyone should abide by. It's a huge pile of BS.
As we need to heal exactly from the narrow culture that these people represent, we need to invent our own techniques and standards and explore what brings us forward. We don't help our cause if we overly respect these figures, just because they come across as selfassured.
@actuallyautistic

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@sahat @actuallyautistic YES! I actually commented on this yesterday -- that psychology "taught to the textbook" and if it wasn't in the textbook it wasn't taught which left out a whole bunch of perspectives.

welltemperedwriter, to bookstodon
@welltemperedwriter@wandering.shop avatar

Some people have to read piles. I have to read boxes, whole cardboard containers I’ve had stacked up for years waiting for me to get around to perusing their contents.

Anyway I’m finally reading Guy Gavriel Kay’s #Tigana. #bookhoard @bookstodon

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@welltemperedwriter @bookstodon Likewise though my boxes are mostly filled with nonfiction on my various areas of interest, but yes TBR-boxes are a must!

KitMuse, to actuallyautistic
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

Autistic special interests/stimming as seen "in the wild" (of our SUV 😂 )

Spouse: 130
Me: Ooh, what a pretty gray. Of course a young amish man has a flashy horse.
Spouse: What? I was counting train cars.
Me: And I was looking at the horse on that Amish cart. It's a gray, so that's flashy for the Amish.

(Ironically we were on the drive home from the first of two testing days to see if I can get my official DX)

@actuallyautistic

18+ KitMuse, to actuallyautistic
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

I have to share this with people who understand. Our guest speaker in our "exceptionality" unit (because Psych of Diversity instructor can't say disability/ableism) was an autism mom who talked about how autistic people see themselves because she reads memes.

It's better than nothing, but I can't believe at a college with a disability resource center, a psychology department couldn't find one person to talk to with lived experience?

#actuallyautistic @actuallyautistic

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I'm asking my fellow for books on Autism. If you have suggestions, I'm happy to hear about them!

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@Autistrain @actuallyautistic @neurodiversity May I suggest the first book in the Neurodivergent Voices series: Grief Volume 1. This is an excellent volume of dealing with the many ways grief shows up in our lives.

Available in print and ebook from most retailers:

https://books2read.com/grief

(Also gentle self promotion that Epona Muse Publishing is looking for essays on many of our "open until filled" anthologies. (https://publishing.eponaauthorsolutions.com)

KitMuse, to actuallyautistic
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

I don't know if it was getting up early to make sure I got into the grad classes I want or what + work being rather quiet + waves hands but I have gotten everything on today's "to do" list done, including 1500 words of writing, which I hadn't been able to manage for the last couple of weeks

AND it's GOOD writing. Like I just got a handful of new characters and WOW.

Maybe my brain just works when I don't feel rushed and overwhelmed? Is that part of being #ActuallyAutistic? @actuallyautistic

KitMuse, to bookstodon
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

I've almost got my spots filled for but would love to keep filling the interview spaces. If you want to be on a zoom livestream talking about your books, your writing process, worldbuilding, anything writing and publishing related, let me know!

Can reply here or through https://eponaauthorsolutions.com/contact

ESPECIALLY interested in hearing from & boosting marginalized (LGBTQIA+, BIPOC, disabled, etc.) voices!

@bookstodon

KitMuse, to bookstodon
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

I'm still looking for authors who have completed NaNoWriMo to come on my #WriteTalkWednesday show and discuss their writing (promo a book or two) and how they made it through #NaNoWriMo

Will need to be avail 6pm CST (central time) on Wedesdays in November.

Reply here or reach out at https://eponaauthorsolutions.com/contact

#bookstodon @bookstodon #AuthorsofMastodon #WritersofMastodon #Author #Fantasy #SF #SFF

KitMuse, to bookstodon
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@peachfront @Rhube @bookstodon Oh that would so not happen here. I'm neurodivergent and we don't drink so while there is a common area and there'd be beverage storage and such, con-party style retreats would not be my style at all. They're too much for me even at conventions.

KitMuse, to bookstodon
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@Rhube @bookstodon Thanks. I have big plans for this property, but I'm also concerned about controlling the number of buildings I'd have to heat w/ no one in them to keep pipes from freezing.

Town is ~25 miles away with lots of hotels, but I'm not sure I'd ever do bigger events where we'd have more than the rooms I'm planning here.

KitMuse, to bookstodon
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

Does anyone know is the Wiccan/Pagan Press Alliance still around?

Also, is there a directory for Wiccan/Pagan/Polytheist publications (fiction or nonfiction) which take submissions?

Was going through my old publications to update my CV for grad school and my article writing muse has awakened.

@bookstodon

ahrimans_erbe, to actuallyautistic German
@ahrimans_erbe@social.anoxinon.de avatar

@actuallyautistic
I have a maybe strange question. So I learned now about the concept of masking, which helps to better describe it. Do you sometimes observe NT people and think they are obviously badly masking? Like doing some "manly hand shakes" and stuff like this. It is so obviously fake and cringy.

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@ahrimans_erbe @actuallyautistic I'm not sure that they're masking per se as it would apply to an autistic population, but what this person has learned in psychology is that a lot of what NT people do is based on making themselves look better compared to their peers or other social groups. So there's a huge jostling for position that IMO NT people don't do to that extent, possibly b/c our energy is spent trying to mask?

KitMuse, to bookstodon
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

Okay, now I want to know if there are any academic journals devoted to speculative fiction. I know there are the anthologies like BtVS and Philosophy (or the book I have on my TBR, the Religions of Star Trek).

If there isn't, must look up what it takes to start one, because that would certainly fall under the umbrella of something I'm working on.

@bookstodon

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@aram @electricarchaeo @bookstodon Thank you both! Bookmarking to read later. I will be starting my MA in Religious Studies this spring (very seriously want to use spec fic in my thesis and I've got a few ideas) and am working on a pantheist nonprofit (church) which will most likely explore the things like my post this morning.

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@Rhube @bookstodon Thank you so much. Both of those sound so interesting! Will be on the lookout for them.

AutisticAdam, to actuallyautistic
@AutisticAdam@autistics.life avatar

If they can’t handle your burnout, they don’t deserve your dopamine highs.

It's as simple as that.

@actuallyautistic #actuallyautistic

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

@AutisticAdam @actuallyautistic That is profound! I love it! Amazing perspective!

KitMuse, to random
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

This is an excellent post, especially her point about FB the "friends" there and how pleas for help will go unanswered. It's something I've experienced; I've quit asking.

I feel like we've gotten too silo'd. Sure, when I was RWA and the only erorom author in the group I was looked down upon. The local SF con said I wasn't a real writer because I wrote romance/smut with SFF elements (that still hurts to this day)

https://firedragons.net/@edebell/111108892578663945

(cont'd)

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

I believe when the marketers invaded publishing around 2012 and started teaching us "rapid release" and "dictate for MOAR WORDS!" we began to lose the community and look upon everyone as someone to market to. Now that social media is fragmenting and communities are losing homes, there's no sense of support, no holding up one another so none of us drown.

The widgetization of books has turned all of us into producers of widgets, not people who pour our essence into our stories to share.

2/

KitMuse,
@KitMuse@eponaauthor.social avatar

So to me, one of the most radical things we can do is reclaim that community. Reach out to one another. I remember group blogs and shared worlds and I'd LOVE to find those again in whatever form they take here. We need to remember that books aren't widgets, their pieces of our soul sent into the world to nourish and sustain not just us, but our readers too.

//

@bookstodon

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