JoBo

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JoBo,

100% certain they weren’t beheaded or it would have been confirmed by now.

Inevitable that children, including babies, died. And also inevitable that Israelis get much more media attention than Palestinians, before and after they are killed by this wickedness.

Predictable that the media are, often uncritically, publishing calls for the massacre of Palestinians in response, while condemning Hamas for doing exactly what they’re demanding Israel do.

JoBo,

Hate the firms that base themselves in the most expensive places possible because they (and the bosses) can rake in the capital gains from property. And the governments which fail to provide usable public transport. Not the poor sods who are not paid enough to live where they work and have to waste hours a day driving a car they would rather not need.

JoBo,

He’s been put back in uniform but cases take a while to get to court.

How to plan something with someone who doesn't have ADHD?

I have ADHD and my partner does not. When we were planning our wedding it was really difficult because she would do most of the planning (because I wasn’t doing it and someone had to and she loves planning), but when we needed to plan anything together it was like pulling teeth for me. I wanted to help out but it was always so...

JoBo,

Then you need to work on getting yourself into the right frame of mind and initiate the planning when you can cope with it. In plenty of time to actually do what needs to be done. Or, give her free rein to make all the decisions now and take responsibility for planning what you will do when you’re there so she actually gets a break out of it.

Whatever happens, if she makes the ‘wrong’ decisions because you wouldn’t give her any input, you don’t get to say a word about it (apart from “I’m sorry, that wasn’t fair on you. It’s cool, we’ll make the best of it.”

JoBo,

ADHD is not one universal set of symptoms and definitely not one universal set of things that you find easy or hard to do. If you’re interested in it, you will do it. If you’re not, you won’t.

How do long time married couples with a single income split finances (not seeking legal advice, literally the how)

I’m talking like one person brought in all the money for a decade, then a divorce happens. Some of it makes sense - a house with mortgage, one spouse buys the other out of the house. Which is great, but if one spouse doesn’t have the income to take a loan out to buy the other, does that mean that the spouse who does have the...

JoBo,

It would usually be the case that the partner with no income had no income because they were raising children and taking care of the home so that the other partner could focus on paid work. In those circumstances, the earning partner would usually be expected to provide ongoing financial support, not just split all the existing assets.

It will always come down to circumstances, and sometimes expensive lawyers, but the financial settlement would often include the whole house if there are dependent children involved.

JoBo,

One theory goes that the decline began in the mid-90s, when the government started its efforts to make Deutsche Bahn fit for sale.

Yep, that’ll do it.

JoBo,

This is more or less what they ended up doing in the UK after rail privatisation, taking the infrastructure back into public hands.

But you can’t have anything like fair competition on train services. It’s not like anyone can just plonk a train on the tracks and outcompete the other trains. They’re awarded franchises, which typically have a monopoly over a particular type of service on those tracks. They can’t be outcompeted, the only way they lose their franchise is if the govt is forced to step in to pick up the pieces (which has happened several times in the UK).

JoBo,

Russia, and former members of the USSR, have a very different idea of what Nazism is. The USSR preferred to ignore the anti-semitism (much as the West preferred to ignore the anti-communism).

What Russians Think When They Hear the Word “Nazi”

Gaza’s shock attack has terrified Israelis. It should also unveil the context (www.972mag.com)

As I write these words, I am sitting at home in Tel Aviv, trying to figure out how to protect my family in a house with no shelter or safe room, following with growing panic the reports and rumors of horrible events taking place in the Israeli towns near Gaza which are under attack. I see people, some of them my friends, calling...

JoBo,

This bit does not ring true:

Such a scenario would be to Toyota’s benefit however, as an unrepairable car will still need replacement—potentially with a new car. Repairability is something the automotive industry has directly combated in recent years, with a Toyota-backed industry group sponsoring a scare campaign to (unsuccessfully) undermine a right-to-repair bill. Car companies make their money from selling new cars, not keeping old ones on the road. If cast bodies serve that end better than those stitched together, it’d be no surprise to see them become the industry standard.

Car companies need their cars to hold their value secondhand so that the people who buy their new cars can afford to replace them more often. The right to repair stuff is about forcing people to use their dealerships for repairs.

No idea what Toyota’s plan is for body repairs but destroying their second-hand market is probably not a part of it.

JoBo,

And?

JoBo,

Imagine a world where you did not get mixed up about which company had been federally convicted.

JoBo,

It’s a difficult area to research because it is impossible to know the direction of the causal arrow; predators may seek out the most violent porn, or sexual violence might be normalised by viewing it, and quite likely a bit of both. But you can’t just say that the production didn’t involve real people therefore no one is harmed.

This is from an anti-porn site so clearly not neutral: Is There a Connection Between Violent Crime and Watching Porn?

Very little of the evidence they cite tries to distinguish between violent porn and any porn but there are some snippets worth taking seriously [numbers in brackets are the references]:

Not surprisingly, the more violent the porn they consume, the more likely they will be to support violence and act out violently. [18] In fact, one study found that those with higher exposure to violent porn were six times more likely to have raped someone than those who had low past exposure. [19]

…

A large portion of the porn consumed by millions of people every day is reinforcing the message that humiliation and violence are normal parts of what sex is supposed to be. [20] It’s wiring the minds and expectations of the upcoming generation, making it harder for many young people to prepare for loving, nurturing relationships [21] and leaving both women and men feeling like they can’t express the pain it’s causing them. [22]

I don’t have the answer. I am not against porn in general. I am obviously against porn where performers have been coerced or mistreated (most of it, tbf) and I do think it is healthier to seek out porn which is explicitly consensual.

Men who are interested in having real, consensual sex could probably do themselves a lot of favours by seeking out female porn directors who are making woman-friendly porn. And, given the link between watching sexual violence and doing sexual violence, whatever the direction of the causal arrow, if you don’t want to be that guy avoiding violent porn is probably a good idea.

JoBo,

the initial goals of the project (to connect Northern England to London).

This was never the goal. Northern England is already connected to London. But the trains to London use the same trains as local commuter trains, which don’t work as a reliable commuter service because they have to squeeze into the gaps between fast trains, and get held up every time a fast train is running late.

HS2 is about giving the fast trains their own track so that local trains can function properly.

Your brain finds it easy to size up four objects but not five — here’s why (www.nature.com)

An experiment found that the brain uses one set of neural circuits to identify the numbers 1–4; these circuits are very specific to their own numbers. A separate set of circuits respond to the numbers 5–9; these are less precise, and are activated by adjacent numbers....

JoBo,

I don’t think that’s why, not least because this is a recent discovery. The reason is, presumably, because 26+ keys are difficult to fit on a small but still usable keyboard.

JoBo, (edited )

Yes. And they had letters grouped with the numbers because 26+ keys is a lot to fit on a small but still usable keyboard (or dial, originally).

JoBo,

You understand that if someone in a low paid job gets a better paid job, the low paid job does not disappear in a puff of smoke? That the proportion of people in low paid work is a function of political decisions as to what the economy should look like?

I mean, the headline is fucking ridiculous (we don’t need anything like 10% of car sales to be new cars). But so is giving careers advice as a solution to the high prevalence of shit pay.

JoBo,

You should not be on the sidewalk so, if there is a bike lane, where else would you be?

The adoptive parents of 2 children found locked inside a barn in West Virginia are facing felony child neglect charges, authorities say (www.cnn.com)

Two children were found locked inside a barn in West Virginia without any running water or bathroom facilities and their adoptive parents are now facing felony child neglect charges, the Kanawha County Sheriff’s Office says....

JoBo,

It’s compact because it’s a headline.

You can’t tell who was locked in the barn from first part of the headline but when you read the bit about them being charged it can only refer to the parents, so the “locked in a barn” bit must be describing the kids and not the parents.

JoBo,

Household expenses should be split such that you both have the same amount of money left after the bills are paid.

Housework should be split such that you both have the same amount of leisure time.

Higher earners should not be regarding their lower paid partners as housekeepers, no. Pull your weight at home or GTFO.

JoBo,

There’s no mirror image? Machismo is an insecurity based on sexist ideas of male supremacy and the fear of some men that they don’t match up to it, so they need to shout about how very manly they are, honest.

You could probably identify something like the tradwives movement as (some) women asserting how incredibly happy they are to be domestic serfs but it’s not really a mirror image of machismo so much as an acquiescence to it and the need to defend that acquiescence.

JoBo,

Should the Cruise car have not started moving if there was a person still on the crosswalk? This whole sad affair raises many questions.

There are some questions but “should cars start moving while a person is still on the crosswalk?” is surely not one of them.

JoBo,

Why? Hit and run is a serious offence and the driverless car has it all on camera.

JoBo,

What have the general public got to do with it? This is a criminal offence, not a viral bit of gossip.

JoBo,

A person laying on the ground in a crosswalk was likely never considered by the team to include in their training data

I didn’t bother reading any further than this. The person was on the crosswalk when both cars started moving. Neither car should have been moving while anyone was still on the crosswalk.

JoBo,

She was standing up when the cars started moving.

JoBo,

It’s not about the ability to recognise someone lying in the road (although they obviously do need to be able to recognise something like that).

She was still walking, upright, on the crosswalk when both cars started moving. No car, driverless or otherwise, should be moving forward just because the lights changed.

JoBo, (edited )

I resent that UI designers are fucking around with trivial, and often annoying, shit when picklists still don’t work properly. If it’s, say, a list of countries and I hit U to find United Kingdom, the visible part of the picklist will be populated with Ts with the first U right at the bottom of it. How is is possible that this has not been resolved in what, three decades of picklists being used?

I also hate those scroll wheels for entering numbers with no option just to type the damn number. Sure, give us options. Don’t make the easiest option impossible.

So much software that you just want to force the designer to actually use, as revenge.

JoBo,

If you install an add-on like “Archive Page”, whenever you encounter cookie options that have been made unnecessarily difficult to navigate, you can just hit the extension button in your toolbar and read it on the archive site instead. If enough people do this, one day they will notice and amend their shitty ways.

This also works for paywalled articles. For now, at least.

What advice would you give a young adult about to move out?

I am asking this question because the young adult in question, is me. I am to move out in a few years, and it feels impossible to move far away from my hometown (which I want). I have no idea how to juggle both finances, a job, and the move itself. With the global inflation going on, it feels impossible getting hold of a decent...

JoBo,

A “few years” is not “about to move out”. You’ve got a long time to work this out.

It is very tough for your generation, no doubt at all. It’s been getting tougher and tougher for the last 50 years. And I witnessed all of those years so I don’t know that anything an old codger like me can say that would be useful to you.

But it is still probably true that young people usually move away from their home towns for a job. So look for the job you can afford to move for and take it from there. Employers know that people have notice periods and need time to move, they won’t be expecting you to start the next day.

That is less true if you’re stuck in low wage work so, if that is the case, get some work experience in an area where agency work is common (care work, warehousing, office temping, etc) or get stuck into the gig economy. Those jobs are portable and you can use agency work to find a permanent employer you like and who likes you.

If you’re in Northern Europe you will be able to claim in-work benefits if your housing costs are too high for your wage to support (just make sure you look up the rules on how much space you’re allowed and how much support you will get).

Moving only takes a day (unless you have shedloads to pack), and house-hunting from afar is one of the few things that is a lot easier these days. Once you know where you want to move to, pick a convenient day or two to visit, check all the online estate agents operating in the area and fix up as many appointments as you can fit in while you’re there. If you see somewhere decent and affordable, don’t waste any time applying for it (you can often get accepted on the spot).

Make sure you think about public transport routes if you move before you know where you will be working. You will need to be close to good bus/tram/train routes to get you from home to where the jobs are, especially if you’re going to start out with an agency. That’s another thing that is fantastically easy to do from afar these days.

You’re either in the EU or you have freedom of movement within the EU so, if language barriers allow, you can cast your net pretty wide.

Start saving now. Moving does not take long but it is costly. You get paid holiday because Northern Europe, so save that up for when you are ready to quit your job and use it to cover your notice period. That way they have to pay you for not turning up to work and you can get a new job while they’re still paying you. Double pay for a few days or weeks goes a long way to covering costs you would otherwise struggle with.

Good luck. Start planning. Even if it’s just a fantasy right now, you’ll come up with some ideas that might actually work and ways to overcome some barriers.

Beware of scammers, especially anyone who approaches you because of a post on social media.

JoBo,

Sewing is good but basic plumbing and carpentry can wait until the OP is is a position to buy a home. Learning how to make your landlord do necessary repairs without getting evicted (and being aware that this may be impossible) is a more important skill for a tenant.

Had my first driving lesson today

I live in Australia but normally get around with a folding bike that I can take on busses and trains easily, however I have decided it’s time to learn to drive, not due to any love of cars but rather just so I can do it if needed. Also I technically own half a car so it would be good if I can use it if I am ever moving or...

JoBo,

And let him know why you’re finding a new driving instructor. You’re paying him to teach you to drive safely and well, not to work yourself up into a fury that other people have the same right to public space as you do.

JoBo,

In the UK also. Obviously pedestrians can’t rely on drivers respecting this right, or even checking whether they need to. But, if you’ve made eye contact, don’t give way to them. Hold up a hand to indicate they need to stop and cross to make them wait like they should.

JoBo,

I saw someone on Mastodon call it that. You are both a disgrace (sorry). This is toad in the hole (sausages baked in Yorkshire pudding).

JoBo,

Yeah, that’s feminism, not “men’s rights”. There are non-toxic sections of the Men’s Movement which explicitly recognise that their aims are feminist but they’re almost invisible because they got overrun by toxic men who only wanted to blame all their problems on women and reclaim their right to rape and exploit them.

This article is not perfect but it does make the point well:

Part Four: A List of “Men’s Rights” Issues That Feminism Is Already Working On

Feminists do not want you to lose custody of your children. The assumption that women are naturally better caregivers is part of patriarchy.

Feminists do not like commercials in which bumbling dads mess up the laundry and competent wives have to bustle in and fix it. The assumption that women are naturally better housekeepers is part of patriarchy.

Feminists do not want you to have to make alimony payments. Alimony is set up to combat the fact that women have been historically expected to prioritize domestic duties over professional goals, thus minimizing their earning potential if their “traditional” marriages end. The assumption that wives should make babies instead of money is part of patriarchy.

Feminists do not want anyone to get raped in prison. Permissiveness and jokes about prison rape are part of rape culture, which is part of patriarchy.

Feminists do not want anyone to be falsely accused of rape. False rape accusations discredit rape victims, which reinforces rape culture, which is part of patriarchy.

Feminists do not want you to be lonely and we do not hate “nice guys.” The idea that certain people are inherently more valuable than other people because of superficial physical attributes is part of patriarchy.

Feminists do not want you to have to pay for dinner. We want the opportunity to achieve financial success on par with men in any field we choose (and are qualified for), and the fact that we currently don’t is part of patriarchy. The idea that men should coddle and provide for women, and/or purchase their affections in romantic contexts, is condescending and damaging and part of patriarchy.

Feminists do not want you to be maimed or killed in industrial accidents, or toil in coal mines while we do cushy secretarial work and various yarn-themed activities. The fact that women have long been shut out of dangerous industrial jobs (by men, by the way) is part of patriarchy.

Feminists do not want you to commit suicide. Any pressures and expectations that lower the quality of life of any gender are part of patriarchy. The fact that depression is characterized as an effeminate weakness, making men less likely to seek treatment, is part of patriarchy.

Feminists do not want you to be viewed with suspicion when you take your child to the park (men frequently insist that this is a serious issue, so I will take them at their word). The assumption that men are insatiable sexual animals, combined with the idea that it’s unnatural for men to care for children, is part of patriarchy.

Feminists do not want you to be drafted and then die in a war while we stay home and iron stuff. The idea that women are too weak to fight or too delicate to function in a military setting is part of patriarchy.

Feminists do not want women to escape prosecution on legitimate domestic violence charges, nor do we want men to be ridiculed for being raped or abused. The idea that women are naturally gentle and compliant and that victimhood is inherently feminine is part of patriarchy.

Feminists hate patriarchy. We do not hate you.

If you really care about those issues as passionately as you say you do, you should be thanking feminists, because feminism is a social movement actively dedicated to dismantling every single one of them. The fact that you blame feminists—your allies—for problems against which they have been struggling for decades suggests that supporting men isn’t nearly as important to you as resenting women. We care about your problems a lot. Could you try caring about ours?

JoBo,

Because it is structural.

JoBo, (edited )

Sexism is inevitably a mirror. Treating girls and women differently inevitably has an impact on boys and men.

If you can think of a legitimate demand to improve life for boys and men which is not also a feminist issue, name it.

If you’re complaining that feminists aren’t backing up Men’s Rights Activists when they call for the right to rape and enserf women, then I can’t help you.

JoBo,

Get a fucking grip.

JoBo,

Oh honey, you’re not the patriarchy. Just one of its useful idiots.

JoBo,

You’re assuming that all car thefts are by someone intending to use them as a lethal weapon?

JoBo,

Reckless car chases have a much higher probability of the worst possible outcome. Property is not more precious than human life, no matter what cops like to believe.

JoBo,

I got this all the time when I had cookies blocked. Happens very rarely now that I allow them for Lemmy. It’s probably down to security settings on your work computer.

They Doxxed Us, We Dox Them – Scenes from the Atlanta Forest (web.archive.org)

"On September 29, the Fulton County Clerk’s office scanned and uploaded the signatures, names, and full legal addresses of 116,000 civilians. These are the identities of a large number of people who signed a petition to convene a referendum on the future of Cop City. This process is being illegally suppressed by the...

JoBo,

What are the homicide rates in the US compared to those countries?

What’s the ratio of random attackers to friends and family getting killed?

Why are you burying yourself in macho fantasies?

JoBo,

Read it again.

What are all the silly and serious easy that you have thought of for carbon recapture?

I sit in a hot office and think about this. I am not sure where to ask. I am genuinely curious. I have seen a breakdown of building solar panels to power the earth 2x over in order to recapture carbon equal to the rate it is being produced, but then areas of the earth that were reflective are now absorbtive of heat…

JoBo,

It’s not an alternative to producing less of the damn stuff. But it can be turned into a useful material, not just stored. Ideally one that can replace, or reduce the carbon footprint of, materials like steel (~2B tons/year) and cement {~4B tons per year).

Something like this: Carbon capture process produces hydrogen and construction materials

Not necessarily exactly that, I have no idea if this one can live up to its promise. The hydrogen by-product has the potential to be extremely useful as a clean fuel but that depends on whether they can eliminate leaks during production.

JoBo,

Difficult without more detail.

Does G understand the damage they are doing or are they still in denial?

How much control does G’s wife have over the household finances?

G needs to want help. And an important means of helping is to prevent him having access to most of his cash. If he can be persuaded to sign over control over his bank accounts, or pay his pension into his wife’s account as soon as he receives it, and get a weekly allowance in return, that might help with the impulse control.

But he’d have to want the help. So the first step is getting him to admit that he has a problem.

It may also be worth the family consulting a solicitor. If he’s in danger of gambling away the house, there may be legal steps you can take. Including having the casino bar him (but this may depend on where you are, and how many casinos he has access to).

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