@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

Autistrain

@[email protected]

#ActuallyAutist #ActuallyAutistic :ir: and train nerd

My username is obviously a portmanteau!

You can also find me https://todon.eu/@autistrain if this instance doesn't work properly.

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

CynAq, to actuallyadhd
@CynAq@neurodifferent.me avatar

PSA about related terminology:

Edit: Please feel free to add as replies any terms or correct/incorrect use cases you would like to make people aware of.

Neurodiversity: the phenomenon that a population is composed of individuals with different neurotypes, and the cultural paradigm based around the understanding of this phenomenon

Neurodiverse: a population or group composed of individuals with different neurotypes.

Neurotypical: the individuals in a neurodiverse population or group with the predominant neurotype within that population or group.

Neurodivergence: any deviation of neurotype from the range of neurological makeups which is considered neurotypical in any neurodiverse population.

Neurodivergent: individuals in a neurodiverse population whose neurotype deviates in any way from the neurotypical range.

Useful rule of thumb and usage examples:

Neurodiverse is only valid when referring to groups and populations. Individuals are not neurodiverse, they are either neurotypical or neurodivergent.

Incorrect: I have many neurodiverse friends.

Correct: we are a neurodiverse friend group, many of us are neurodivergent.

Incorrect: How can I make this accessible to neurodiverse students?

Correct: How can I make this accessible to neurodivergent students? (Does not include neurotypical students within the context of the question)

Correct: How can I make this accessible to a neurodiverse group of students? (Potentially includes neurotypical students within the context of the question, if the group has neurotypical individuals in it)

@actuallyautistic @actuallyadhd

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@CynAq

Neurodifferent and neurodifference are other terms. I acknowledge they are less known and used.

@actuallyautistic @actuallyadhd

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

Now I remember what I wanted to write.

I was wandering yesterday in the woods. It was nice and quiet. It was rainy too.

I looked around me and I was thinking about the difference between my vision of the woods and others. Nowadays I'm aware I don't see the same number of details as many others. In the past, I would say "look at this! or Do you see that?" and people would say no and deny or dismiss what I saw. They were thinking I was strange or even I had an issue.

Then at a moment in my life, I discovered I'm an autist. It was a relief. I discovered my culture and identity. Since then, I have learned a lot about myself. This new knowledge is partly about how I see what is surrounding me.

I knew that I saw things that people didn't. And yesterday, I had a great example in the woods. I don't see the woods or the forest. I see the trees. My brain will look at all the trees and not at the global. This is a big difference. The second step is that I often see small details. It's not only details close to me. It's detail far away that is small with the distance.

This brings a difference in the perception of the environment and a difference in what we speak about. It's important to them and communicate about it. It's important to know that we aren't at fault in these cases. We can explain and have a discussion about what we see. It's important to validate what we see for our mental health.

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

Autistrain, to actuallyautistic
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I read this paper — Exploring the experiences of autistic pupils through creative research methods: Reflections on a participatory approach — and was lost in my thought for a couple of seconds. Interventions for children shouldn't be a thing. Instead of them, therapies to teach children they are and what it means for them. It's autism empowerment so they can have a better life with fewer mental health issues.

@neurodiversity @actuallyautistic

theautisticcoach, to actuallyautistic
@theautisticcoach@neurodifferent.me avatar

There is nothing more neurotypical than doing FaceTime on speaker phone on a packed Metro

@actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@theautisticcoach
I see people on visio call all the time in the transit. I can't even have a simple phone call in them.
@actuallyautistic

Autistrain, to actuallyautistic
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I'm happy these days while reading random things about autism. I'm seeing more and more of the use of neuro/identity affirmative language out there. It feels good to see a ramping tendency towards the use of this language.

The word neurotype is becoming more mainstream. I read it across articles. I read that the human brain has variations more frequently. This is in my point of view great. This is a small step in recognizing the human differences known and unknown. It's how we will build a better word of integration.

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

Autistrain, to actuallyautistic
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

It's language week for me. I read way too much on the impact of the language we use on the people. During my journey, actually today, I found this amazing guide on "How to talk about autistic ways of being" - identity-affirming language - from Community Against Prejudice Towards Autistic People.

It's here:

https://captapnetwork.wordpress.com/2023/09/19/how-to-talk/

Note: I'm aware this is the choice of everyone and I respect it.

@neurodiversity @actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

AutisticAdam, to actuallyautistic
@AutisticAdam@autistics.life avatar

A rather interesting thing to do is explain you are Autistic to someone but only don't use the word ‘Autistic’ and just say "neurological" and watch how seriously they take you until you tell them it's Autism.

@actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@AutisticAdam

I like it! It's such a good way to show them what's autism is in reality.

@actuallyautistic

#actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@masukomi

I would not even speak about disorder.

For example: "You know people put they hand in their hair to show they are interested by the person. Others will speak about they passion for this purpose. It's different way to show the interest. It's neurological." or "I like when the person is explaining something with details. It gives a structure to the topic."

And you can go on and on like this to show and explain autistic traits.

@AutisticAdam @actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@guidedbywire

Yes, it can be taken as flirty, for example. It's one of these stims that can be misunderstood.

I will add that you don't have to stop. Please keep your stims as they are. It's not healthy to change them (except if they are harmful, like self injuring).

@masukomi
@AutisticAdam @actuallyautistic

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I don't know if I already wrote about this psychologist. I met a psychologist, and we talked about autism and what it's to be . It was really nice with good arguments. The psychologist didn't judge autists and wanted to learn about us. When we came to language, I talked about neuro-affirmaive language and how it's moving in this domain. We see more and more papers about it. I didn't receive any objection from this therapist. Better, the therapist asked me to send to it the paper and references, so he could have sources and learn.

We can meet pleasant people who as the will to learn and don't say that they know better because of an academic diploma.

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

autistrain, to autisticadvocacy
@autistrain@todon.eu avatar

Yesterday, on the train, an autists sat in front of me. This person was openly stimming in public. I found that it was great to find another who stims in public. Those small things make me happy.

@actuallyautistic.gup.pe @autisticadvocacy

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@autistrain
Xhxhbx

@autisticadvocacy

AutisticAdam, to actuallyautistic
@AutisticAdam@autistics.life avatar

Does anyone else think it’s messed up that a lot of what are considered ‘socially inappropriate’ behaviours are just traits of being Autistic?

If you’re too straightforward, you’re rude.

If you’re too passionate, you’re dramatic.

If you’re too quiet, you’re not a team player.

The list goes on.

@actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

It's changed in the last few years. What you describe is still the case in a certain industry and in the mainstream. It will take some time to change in the last one.

But, the good news, it's changing in a part of the research with really good papers coming out. The other positive aspect is that we are more and more to embrace the neurotype paradigm.

Things are changing but as always it takes (too much) time.

@AutisticAdam

@actuallyautistic

#actuallyautistic

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I read the conversation and debate about hashtags and autism. The pros, the cons. But, something wasn't right in my head. My brain could not process part of it with satisfaction. A piece of the puzzle was missing for me.

As always, I let the subject in the back of my head. I don't even think about it at all. I had a tough week with a lot of sensitivity and socializing. My brain was tired. And I like, I go for a hike in nature and look at my area of interest to energize. This morning I went for a hike going up and down hills listening to music and podcasts.

Often, one or more ideas I let in the back of my head pop out with an explanation, the missing piece of the puzzle for me.

I want first to clear the dx part. Autism isn't attached to a diagnosis. Many of the tools to diagnose are outdated and don't make any sense nowadays. ADI-R is near BS for example.

We are autists as we are born autists and will die autists. This matter, this is important, this is at the center. Outside in the wild world, a lot of people are using the term autism badly to build an industry and make money. It's no secret. People are scaring parents to make money and sell diagnosis and conversion therapies. This is wrong.

Back to the hashtags, I saw multiple proposals. reminds me to "we are all a little bit autistic" which is wrong. I get and understand why and from where it comes. We can't gatekeep the terms autism, autistic or autist. It would not be right. We are all in the same boat with or without diagnosis. For example, I have a diagnosis not to be sure I'm an autist. I have it for the sole purpose of accessing accommodations. It's how my country works based on ableism. It's also hard to access it depending on where the person lives, the financial situation, the mental health, etc.

If we gatekeep the hashtag , we would be ableist. We would discriminate against disabled. It makes no sense other than a small minority want to see themselves better than others. This is an ego problem. It's the lack of validation and not being recognized. It's not fine at all. When fighting for our rights, we put our ego on the side.

This is partly true in the opposite direction. The process of acceptance, validation and being recognized is long and hard. This is when the last piece of the puzzle came to me. The issues with all these hashtag dramas are internalized ableism. At the beginning, it was to differentiate to whom the discussion was. What's still true, the simple assessment is that the person is autistic. When it comes to the differentiation of with or without dx, it's internalized ableism. The fact that one group thinks they are oppressed by the other group. This ends with people thinking they are inferior. What is not the case! We are all at the same level.

This is what's happening. A minority thinks a diagnosis makes them superior. Another minority thinks this makes them inferior. And a hashtag crystallizing the tension of both groups.

If you ended here, thanks for reading until the end.

@neurodiversity @actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@obrerx @neurodiversity @actuallyautistic

On the minority topic, we should be careful. On social media, we have a huge echo chamber effect. The minority can look bigger than it's.

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

This evening I went to an art exposition from an autist that I know. It was great and I made new connections with new #ActuallyAutistic friends there.

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I was reading the paper "What can neurodiversity tell us about inner speech, and vice versa? A theoretical perspective".

It's new from last week (September 5th). It's a good lecture to better understand how inner speech works differently for us and how it shows in autists.

I read this:

"the apparent lack of verbal strategy in autistic participants did not make them worse at the task. This is consistent with a broader range of evidence highlighting that structural language skills and verbal IQ do not predict cognitive performance in autistic adults in a similar way to neurotypical individuals (e.g. Constable et al., 2018),suggesting that language in general may occupy a different place within autistic cognition."

This made perfect sense for me and how I work. I don't like to speak to myself. It's painful and it's not natural. I like to imagine with colors, patterns, images, objects, etc. I also need a situation with a place.

I fix a lot of things at home without the help of anyone for an example. The way I realize them in my brain before applying is autistic and not verbal.

Link to the paper:

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S001094522300206X

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

The paper is about inner speech. My quotation is to show that inner speech in autists is different, occur differently, and occupies a different place in cognition.

I speak a lot and can speak for hours. But, my inner speech isn't the experience of talking to oneself in one’s head. It's different and has different effect on my cognition than for NTs.

@TeacherGriff @actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

Smell, touch, etc. are image/pattern/colors. It depends on which one. But, I have hypersensitivity and often, I combine the image with the hypersensitivity. For example, if I smell a flower, my brain will interpret it as pins pricking the inside of my nose. It's purely an image in my brain.

@CynAq @actuallyautistic

neuralex, to actuallyautistic
@neuralex@neurodifferent.me avatar

Do people think you’re mad [at them] when you’re just elaborating?

https://reddit.com/r/AutismTranslated/s/QcSjYltO02

@actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@neuralex

It happens time to time. It's not always the case. I generally explain why I need to be clear with details. It mostly does the trick, and people are comprehensives after that.

@actuallyautistic

obrerx, to actuallyautistic
@obrerx@neurodifferent.me avatar

@allautistics
@actuallyautistic

I'm gonna ramble a bit. I usually try to be coherent, and take my time, but I just don't even know where I'm going here just yet.

There are assumptions I see in current Mastodon discussions that are misleading or even wrong about so-called "late diagnosed".

One is that those who weren't screened as children must not be very autistic, and that these late diagnosed persons assume superiority and higher status, and then dominate spaces and talk over the early diagnosed.

Trying to get a sense of this, because I'm very late diagnosed. No doubt there is some validity to this point for some. I haven't seen it, but that doesn't mean it isn't there.

But I will say that some of these "takes" are very much like the toxic views of the "autism parents" on Twitter, who think adult autistics are all "high functioning" or not autistic at all, just people who are frauds and wannabes.

Having said that, being neurodivergent isn't new to me. I knew I was different in my early teens but saw myself as having a very different "consciousness" than others, rather than a different neurology (long story). And I was dx'd as ADHD 23 years ago, and self-diagnosed as autistic 8 years ago, and then received a formal diagnosis of ASD about 2 years ago. So is that "newly diagnosed"? Lol. I've lived the autistic life longer than most on the planet at this point. I'm hardly uneducated in the topic.

So I've known about my differences for a long, long time. ADHD is anything but "new" to me.

As to autism, I think it will always be "new" to me, and yet it will always be something I've lived with all of my life. And I've been alive for awhile.

Included either directly or by implication in some of the comments I've read is the pathologizing of autism, and separating the autistic community into severity levels, a concept that is clumsy and inaccurate, and often results in withholding assistance to those who are perceived as "mildly" autistic or underestimating and infantilizing those seen as "severe".

And it also misses the fact that people who grew up before 1980 (and especially before 1970 or 1960) would not likely be screened as autistic, and instead could be treated as a "terrible, strange, misbehaved child" with resulting parental neglect and abuse (raises hand), or misdiagnosed as any of a plethora of other conditions including schizophrenia (raises hand) or intellectual disability.

They might be hospitalized as needing in-patient psychiatric care (raises hand).

They might be terrorized by siblings (as in fearing for my life in repeated, prolonged, and constant attacks) and left to fend for themselves leading to lifelong trauma and all the self-esteem and others traits of PTSD and c-PTSD (raises hand).

Undiagnosed autistics can be treated with a high degree of neglect, misinterpretation, leading to severe estrangement from parents, and outright physical abuse by parents and siblings.

My mother was autistic (I'm quite certain). My brother was autistic (quite certain). My grandmother was institutionalized and I think that was autism.

But no one knew about autism when my grandmother and mother were born. My mother was delayed in speaking, potty training, tying shoelaces, delayed in learning to read. Because of her differences she was horribly abused by her aunt who raised her.

Oh but she was undiagnosed so she must not have been very autistic. Right?

She had no friends throughout her shortened life, although she managed to do well in college, and received a masters in family counseling from CalTech in her 40s. She spent most of her time reading, sitting in bed at night, when she wasn't teaching "educationally handicapped" children (that was the term in those days... so interesting that she chose that as her career).

She died by suicide when I was 26. I gave her CPR at 3 AM, and I'll never fucking forget those staring, dead eyes. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

That's my family life.

This is part one. Part 2 follows.

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@liscarey

:(

This reminds me of my mom, autist too. She started smoking to mask and be with others as she always was the weird girl. Fast forward, after years of smoking she had cancer. Hopefully, the surgery and the chemotherapy went well. She now lives cancer free for some time.

It's a good example of the tax we are paying as autists to fit in. It's not just mental health.

@yourautisticlife @marenf @obrerx @allautistics @actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@obrerx

People growing up before the 2000 were not screened for autism. It really depends of the country. Even in the western world, a lot of countries still struggle to identify autism if the kid has no intellectual impairment. For adults, it's worse.

Even the most innovative country don't know how to deal with autism. It would be funny if it wasn't a life treat. It's sad because people have to trick the system to get help and accomodations.

@allautistics @actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@liscarey

I recommend the read of the interview of Lovaass in Psychology Today 1974-01. It's horrific and a good illustration of where some still are. It's against any human right with shock and restrain all over the interview.

https://archive.org/details/sim_psychology-today_1974-01_7_8/page/18/mode/1up

or pm me.

@marytzu @marenf @obrerx @allautistics @actuallyautistic

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

Today, it's lecture day. I can recommend the lecture of the perspective article about autism, research accuracy and anti-ableism:

Anti-ableism and scientific accuracy in autism research: a false dichotomy

https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyt.2023.1244451/full

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I have a monotropic flow when I'm learning and at work. This morning, I read this really good post about monotropism in children and young adults. But, I found it interesting for adults too. It gives a good explanation why the respect of the monotropic flow is important for . It's a factor for good mental health, skills, success, development and more.

Embracing Autistic Children’s Monotropic Flow States

https://ndconnection.co.uk/blog/embracing-autistic-childrens-monotropic-flow-states

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

It's the third heat wave we have here. The first wasn't a pleasure. The second was hard. The third is definitely too much.

Like many of #actuallyautistic , I have this hypersensitivity to the hot weather. It's fine and I can cope with one heat wave. But 3 heat waves each year will not be possible. Period.

At 24-25°C, it's my limit. It's September in the northern hemisphere and we should not have heat waves at this period of the year.

Also, heat waves make me quieter here as they take the most of my available energy. The good point is that the nights aren't hot. At least,I can sleep during this time.

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

On my journey, I like to walk across botanical gardens. They are great for multiple reasons. They are mostly quite and provide nature. We know how important it is to be in touch with the nature. The botanical garden has a lot of details with different flowers, leafs, trees, light shape... It's a detail paradise. For people like me who love details, it's an amazing visual stim.

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

AutisticAdam, to actuallyautistic
@AutisticAdam@autistics.life avatar

The autistic urge to pack everything you own and bring it with you whenever you leave your home. You might only be going to the shop/mall down the road, but you’ll be prepared for an apocalypse.

@actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

It's useful if you go hiking for one week or more. It's easier to pack just one object than two or three and avoid weight.

@doubleblind @AutisticAdam @actuallyautistic

alexisbushnell, to actuallyautistic
@alexisbushnell@toot.wales avatar

Well today was stressful and I am still really struggling with sensory overload.

Heading to a friend's to watch a film set in Wales, where I am no doubt going to either accidentally mask because it just happens automatically or freak them out by being Very Autistic™.

@actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@alexisbushnell
Good to hear that! It's a nice feeling to be able to mask less/unmask with people around. They are great friends.
@actuallyautistic

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

Yesterday, I asked a question about parent, mourning and normal. I want to thank everyone who answered. I'm doing a general response here, what will preserve everyone feed with spam. There is no right or wrong answer, opinion to it.

The diversity of the answers is great and shows how we are all unique with a unique life's journey. They all have arguments and are understandable.

Thank you!

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

#actuallyautistic

https://neurodifferent.me/@Autistrain/110979607380609901

AutisticAdam, to actuallyautistic
@AutisticAdam@autistics.life avatar

If someone in person tells me something bad has happened to them, my first response is to share a similar experience I have had, as a way to show solidarity and remind them they're not alone.

@actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

It's a way how autists empathize with others beside for example resolving problem/issue. It's also a way to show we are at the same level. I lived the same experience therefore we're the same. Autists don't like (for a part of them) the idea of superiority and inferiority. It's part of the fact to have a great social justice mind.

It shows that we have a great sense of socializing and in multiple ways. It's shows again our great capabilities to communicate. It's not easy to open ourself to others in a personal way. It's requiring efforts and energy. This is the opposite of the lack of communication and socializing.

We have to remember all of this is unique to the autist opening an infinity of possibilities.

@AutisticAdam

@actuallyautistic

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I have a question to about a sentence that a father of an autistic child said. What do you think/is your reaction to the following sentence?

"There's a little mourning to be done about having a normal child."

I deliberately don't give my opinion to avoid any influence.

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

Sci_Fi_FanGirl, to actuallyautistic German
@Sci_Fi_FanGirl@hessen.social avatar

Exhaustion after enjoyable events

Last Saturday I spent the day with a group of people. Some of them were strangers. We went to a nearby city and did many fun activities. Even though I was very afraid of the day, I actually enjoyed it very much.

The next two days I felt completely hung over, although I didn't drink alcohol. Today I'm better, but still very tired and a bit dissociated.

Do you know this, too?

@actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

When it happens, you have to take care of your mental health. Otherwise, it's a first step to autistic burnout. There is some basic advice:

  • spend time to rest
  • spend time to be alone
  • spend time in the nature, we need contact with it. You can also stay in the nature to read a book or doing nothing
  • do an energizing activity (reading, spending time with your pet, doing nothing, sleeping, playing video games or ... or ... or ...) For me personalty, it's stimulating my intellect.
  • spending time on your area of interest
  • saying that you need time for yourself to the people around you
  • speaking with autists like you're doing here

The best in this case is to prevent such social hungover. It's better to prevent than to cure. Next to work on the three pillars (accepting, unmasking and meeting autists), it's important to discover/spot the early signs. Once you know them, it's critical to learn and spot them as soon as possible. These signs can be increase in stimming, anxiety, stress tunnel vision, blurred vision, exhaustion, finding yourself in the background, having less interactions/communication, it's become harder to speak, dissociation, etc.
These signs are highly personal, and we all have a different mix of signs.

When the signs appear, it's time to ask yourself if you need to quit and go home or take a break. With times, you will learn and know how long you can stay and with how many people you can hang out. For example, I can stay two hours with five people but only one hour with more.

Step after step, you learn how to adapt the environment to your human needs.

@Sci_Fi_FanGirl @actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

Amazing! It's important to notice our limits. But, sometimes it doesn't work and it's not dramatic. We are humans after all and to be excited is part of it.

I'm working on the time. I check how I feel after a certain amount of time and take to leave or not.

@Sci_Fi_FanGirl
@actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

Yes, and sorry for my bad English, the day had a lot of anxiety.

@Sci_Fi_FanGirl @actuallyautistic

hosford42, to autisticadvocacy
@hosford42@techhub.social avatar

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity @autisticadvocacy

Apologies for the inevitable pathologizing language in this paper, but I suspect my fellow #ActuallyAutistic folks might like to know that it shows a NEGATIVE correlation between #autistic traits and so-called "black-and-white" thinking. For anyone uncomfortable with the statistics speak, they found that the higher a person scores on the Autism Quotient screening test, the lower they tend to score on a black-and-white thinking test

Nature.com: Autistic traits associated with dichotomic thinking mediated by intolerance of uncertainty | Scientific Reports
https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-023-41164-8

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

Thank you for sharing! It's a really good news for us.

I archived the paper if someone need it in the future.

@hosford42

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity @autisticadvocacy

#actuallyautistic #Autistic

spika, to actuallyautistic
@spika@neurodifferent.me avatar

I feel like whenever I see meltdowns discussed it's in the context of how to deal with them if you're having one yourself or how to explain to allistic people what a meltdown is, but one of the things I rarely see and truthfully currently struggling with is how to handle or even name the difficult emotions and exhaustion that come up as an autistic person who's pretty regularly been witness to another autistic person's meltdowns.

#ActuallyAutistic @actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I like to spend time with my area of interest, walking preferably in the nature and take time for me.

Seeing some having a meltdown gives me flashback of myself and give me high anxiety. The other thing is I am like a sponge and will suck the anxiety of the person having a meltdown. At the end, it gives me negative emotions and feelings.

I take care of me afterward if it's a friend or some I know. Sometimes, it's too much to handle for me and I prefer to go away for my mental health.

@spika @actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

@spika

Yes, and if I can add, it's important to acknowledge that it's fine and not selfish to give priority to our own mental health.

@actuallyautistic

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

This evening. I was asked to take a pan out. So I did! I take it and that's it. Why should I start cooking or just put some oil in it?

An illustration how small usual thing can be hard if not asked with all the details in the life of an #actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

Autistrain, to neurodiversity
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I sometimes like to read paper on autism. As it's important to know more on the subject and validate my experience of the life. We can find amazing research. The opposite is also true.

For a couple of years, maybe a dozen, the ABA industry has developed a tobacco industry strategy. The oil industry used the same strategy to deny the climate change induced by oil consumption.

The ABA industry likes to publish papers without using gold standards (Example: using just 5 autistic children doesn't valide your find.), using old set of data which had been invalidate and not disclosing conflict.

This industry publishes a lot for what it's worth to prove they aren't wrong just like the tobacco industry published on cigarettes not arming people (when we knew it wasn't the case) or the oil industry published that climate change wasn't their fault/denying it.

People need to be critical and aware of manipulation and a paper isn't proof of anything. It has to follow standards to be of quality.

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

CuriousMagpie, to actuallyautistic
@CuriousMagpie@mastodon.social avatar

I just found out that my landlord is raising my rent $150/mo, adding heat into my utilities, and no longer wants to accept my housing voucher. He could have told me when he decided 4 months ago, but waited until I asked him for a copy of the new lease to review. I have to be out by November 1. Like everywhere else, the #housing market is tight. I don't want to be homeless again.
I'm already exhausted and overwhelmed.
Please send kind thoughts my way @actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I'm sorry. I wish you to find something nice for you soon. Let's hope you will find a better landlord for the future.

@CuriousMagpie

@actuallyautistic

#housing

Autistrain, to actuallyautistic
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I don't know if I should thank you for remembering me about Wakefield.

He harmed and still harms a lot of autists with his bullshit. I still hear people talking about his conspiracy, and people are believing him. This triggers me so much.

@markusl @hellomiakoda @hosford42 @dbc3 @cwebber @ginsterbusch @dpnash @sentient_water @Tooden @actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

sebwhatever, to actuallyautistic
@sebwhatever@mastodon.social avatar

@actuallyautistic What's your favorite books on autism?

Unmasking Autism by Devon Price has been illuminating.

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

Untypical by Pete Wharmby

Autistic Masking: Understanding Identity Management and the Role of Stigma by Amy Pearson, Kieran Rose

Empire of Normality: Neurodiversity and Capitalism by Robert Chapman

These 3 are good and actual (2023).

@sebwhatever @actuallyautistic

Autistrain, to actuallyautistic
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

It's time to take some time with my area of interest (trains) to have some nice time and energize myself.

Don't forget to allow you some time with your area of interest. It's life-saving in some case. It's also one of our human need! Enjoy this time.

@actuallyautistic

Autistrain, to actuallyautistic
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I haven't mention it to a lot of people around me. I said it toy parents and my sister. Part of my family learned about it when I went in the local news/at the radio.

I don't disclose it in general. It's not by fear of the reaction. I don't care about what they think.

It's private and not public like my gender, my sexuality, etc. I don't mask even in public. I stopped for my mental health and to be myself. But, I will not write "I'm an autist" on my head.

I prefer to choose who I will tell I'm an autist.

@markusl
@jenandra @hosford42 @Tooden @andrewporter @cwebber @ginsterbusch @dpnash @sentient_water @actuallyautistic @neurodiversity @pathfinder

AutisticAdam, to actuallyautistic
@AutisticAdam@autistics.life avatar

Autistic people try their best every day to adapt to non-autistic people, exhausting ourselves.

Do non-autistic people ever try to adapt for autistic people?

@actuallyautistic #actuallyautistic

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I thought at the beginning that my mom did. At least one person in my near circle would be. Now, we know it wasn't the case. Well, she is as autistic as me.

But, I know people who are adapting to autist. The first is a retired professional. This person worked with autistic child the most of the time.

The second person is a great psychologist. This person wants to learn even on ableist language and adapt to autist.

@AutisticAdam @actuallyautistic

Tooden, to neurodiversity
@Tooden@aus.social avatar

@andrewporter Plus, it's author is Simon Baron-Cohen - renowned misogynist; rumoured to be friend of TERFs & eugenicists. @markusl @cwebber @ginsterbusch @dpnash @sentient_water @hosford42 @actuallyautistic @neurodiversity @pathfinder

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

Having an autistic relative doesn't protect you to be a bad person about autism. In fact, I meet so many people with autists in their family who believed in fixing the autists and they had bad behaviors with the autists. The worst is they don't want to listen and they know better than you (the classic!)

@jenandra
@hosford42 @Tooden @andrewporter @markusl @cwebber @ginsterbusch @dpnash @sentient_water @actuallyautistic @neurodiversity @pathfinder

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

I can second this about the diagnosed child. I saw two groups. It's not two closed groups. The first with an amazing support who know their limits, learned about themselves and about autism. You see the self determination, the good strategies, etc. Sadly, it's a minority.

The second is where child were told they will not be able to do this, this and this. Professionals and parents use autism as an excuse. Later, the child, now teenager or adult, use autism as an excuse too. Or worst, professional and parent didn't talk about autism at all or want to fix the kid. These child later in the teenage years don't know about themselves and who they are. They struggle a lot and often refuse to learn about themselves because they have to be like the others.

The good news is that people go from the second to the first group. With the struggles and the time, people change their mind and are learning about autism.

@sentient_water
@markusl @jenandra @hosford42 @Tooden @andrewporter @cwebber @ginsterbusch @dpnash @actuallyautistic @neurodiversity @pathfinder

Autistrain,
@Autistrain@neurodifferent.me avatar

Yes, the acceptation of the differences is important and more than a diagnosis. The best would be an inclusive world without diagnosis, celebrating the differences of each of us.

@hosford42 @sentient_water @markusl @jenandra @Tooden @andrewporter @cwebber @ginsterbusch @dpnash @actuallyautistic @neurodiversity @pathfinder

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