TL:DR Wet; Boiler diagnostics completed; Galaxy quest rocks; Lots of love to my Bestie ! 🤗🥰
What a day, was so tired this morning that I had a quick chat with my Bestie then went back to bed for s couple of hours.
Drove over to my Mother in Laws in the pouring rain , found that I had to clean out the tiny room where the boiler lived before I could get a proper look at it!
Powered off the boiler & spent a merry 20 minutes fighting with the front cover which hadn’t been removed in years !
Got Simon our tame plumber on a video call so that he could diagnose the fault with me - turns out that the fan is dead.
Got slightly triggered when one of my MiLs’ carers rocked up, but we both had our separate jobs to do so interaction was reduced to a quick “Good Morning”.
Sorted out getting details needed for ordering the replacement fan & then had to break the news to my MiL that yon plumber could rock up next week to fit the new fan & she need to agree to that & to paying him.
An hour & a half later we finally convinced her that this was basically the only way to go.
Several triggers were hammered home & I nearly stormed out at one point when she argued that it didn’t need to be done because “I’m immune to hypothermia” , naughty words competed vigorously to be the 1st to be released upon the world, but good manners prevailed & I held them at bay!
We finally got her to agree & raced off at speed before she could change her mind !
A stop off at Costco on the way home for a much needed hot dog & a Cherry cola , followed by Xmas treat shopping helped to get my mind back into a less stressed mode !
Got home & worked with Mrs Squirrel to complete her ASD Informants report form. Thankfully she was able to fill in a lot more than my Dad did !
Bestie went to bed early again feeling rough, wish her a speedy recovery 🤗🥰
Watched ‘Galaxy Quest’ for the first time in years & enjoyed it enormously, it was interesting to see both the nods made by the movie to the space sci-fi genre & also the nods made by other later movies to Galaxy Quest.
A quick catch up on here , & sadly it was only a quick one , has led us to me writing up my diary.
Final Thoughts:
Mother in Laws like mine are the epitome of the gags made by comedians in the late 70’s !
She could be more rude (yet to receive a thank you) awkward or just plain childish if she had wanted to , thankfully she stopped just short of getting the boiler outer casing wrapped round her like a steel straitjacket !
I cannot even begin to list the triggers bounced on from a great height. I am, in retrospect , quite pleased that I recognised some of them & took appropriate steps to minimise their impact!
I may adopt the quote : “ Never give up, Never Surrender ! “ Jason Nesmith - Galaxy Quest !
Thanks to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you ! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
Each day, I pour my heart into my work... to be a voice in our autism journey. Basically, cuz I gotta. That's special interests for ya...
But now, I’ve hit a snag.
Our car, my lifeline in this rural Owensburg, is crying for help. We were so fortunate...
Family members Zach & Sky GAVE us the van. Our Odyssey's absolutely neccessary to survive. At least in the country village we chose to support my autistic sensory need.
But we're facing brakes & tires. Which ain't cheap. I’m staring down a $500 bill.
Plus Christmas is coming for the family. Kimmie has 7 extraordinary kids. And then there's the 17 grandkids showing more and more signs of extraordinary every day...
If you've found a friend in my words, consider lending a hand. It’s more than just money; it’s keeping our dream of an autistic community alive.
You guys make MY dreams come true. Every day. In my freaking 70s.
It's my raw hope, I help make one or two come true for you by sharing my lived experience.
I’m forever grateful for your past support. Together, we're more than just a community; we're a family.
With your help, we can continue this amazing journey. Thanks for being the stars in my night sky.
Big shoutout to EVERYBODY for always being there. And making AutisticAF Out Loud a reality!
Angie Kilroy
Bernard Grant
Bernadette Grosjean
Brea Corwin
Bridget Donahue
Burnett Grant
Chris Thompson
Cinja
Ed Dupree
Fellow Autistic
Heidi
Irene
JD Goulet
Jim Hogan
Kimmie Knapp
Marcus Garrett
Martin Nutbeem
Merlin Star
Nonimiz on TikTok
Potto
Tad
Wick
Zach & Sky Granger
And a dozen more folks who prefer anonymity.
It beautifully illustrates the fact that freedom of thought and expression is a universal need, and #ActuallyAutistic people are no exception.
There isn't a single population on Earth which doesn't have some sort of independence myth, but Jewish people might be unique in going through the process of regaining their autonomy countless times throughout history.
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 38 Wednesday 6/12/23
TL:DR Project WOOF is back on track !; I love walking in sunny conditions; Squirrel to the rescue , no problem too small to look at & say ‘Nope , not a nut in a blenders chance of me fixing this! ‘;
Besties deserve all the hugs the internet can carry ! ; Triggers , what triggers !
Up at 4am as per, had a long chat with my Bestie, which was great 😊
After breakfast & a catch up session on here , I checked the weather & saw it was going to be a sunny day so with a little prompting from a dear friend I went for a walk up to Windy Hill , it was really sunny, but very cold - 2 hours & 12400 steps later I got home, knackered but having had a really enjoyable walk & talk my friend on the phone.
My Bestie was feeling under the weather this afternoon so chatting was limited to me doing what I do best & bombarding her with cute memes 😊 . Hopefully a decent nights sleep will see her right 🤗🥰
The rest of the day was fairly routine right up until around 16:30 when Mrs Squirrel popped her head around the door & asked if I could do a ‘favour’.
This turned out to be an emergency dash across the moors to my Mother in Laws’ to look at a none functioning boiler.
I’m no plumber , but I can do basic diags like check for power / gas / general functionality .
The boiler was deader than week old fish finger sandwich !
Did the old turn it off & on again routine , on the vague chance that The Lady would smile on me (if you have to ask who The Lady is then you need a pTerry refresher course ! ) but she didn’t.
We dug out a couple of electric heaters so yon MiL wouldn’t freeze to death & came back home with a plan to sort out a plumber tomorrow .
Once we got home I tried our tame plumber - Simon- who has serviced our boiler for years, on the off chance he would wonder to the end of the known world to look at a manky boiler.
Turns out that we can save some dosh & I can go across in the morning and take him with via the magic of a video call! He thinks its a fan & wants me to confirm it so we can reduce the time it takes for a fix.
Yay, gotta wonder ‘lonely as a Squirrel’ across the moors again !
Final Thoughts:
This morning was really enjoyable , it’s getting much easier to leave the house if my Bestie gives me a prod 😊
Mucho triggers faced down this afternoon & evening, no wonder I’m shagged ! The time critical nature of the situation & the diagnostic element absolutely helped draw my mind away from the whole going out, ‘socialising’ , ringing people things !
Anxiety is still there tho, I worry that I could have done more or that I should have rung Simon from MiLs house & then we would be that bit closer to a solution !
Thanks to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you ! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
Is there any value in pursuing a potential autism diagnosis as an adult, if a person gets along well enough in life and isn't interested in finding community?
@smeg Difficult to answer. I've known many people driven simply by a desire to understand 'why.' And I'd be very interested to know how this person defines "gets along well enough?" @actuallyautistic#actuallyautistic
@smeg@actuallyautistic Many people who did not know me well would have said I got on well enough—a challenging social barometer—and they would have been wrong. Though I'll admit, if I hadn't needed help, had deficits not been perceived by the doctor, I'd have not likely pursued diagnosis on my own due to stigma and internalized ableism. #actuallyautistic
@smeg@actuallyautistic I simply didn't know I needed more knowledge, support, and tools to help myself than I had ever been allowed before. It was inconceivable to me that there were skills I could lear or accommodations I could ask for that could make some parts of life less challenging. #actuallyautistic#autism
TL:DR Meh still rules , but in the face of todays video meeting I was forced to tidy my desk! ; Official Diagnosis process has well & truly started! ; Besties Rock! ; Mastodonians Rock !
Busy day today, once I actually dug myself out of my pit, which I really didn’t want to do!
On the plus side the house was quiet as Mrs Squirrel was in the office !
Phase 1 of a major desk tidy revealed that there was actually a desk under all the junk after all !
Phase 2 will be going thru all the aforementioned junk & either bining it or putting it away.
Also moved & re-cabled my docking station so that it stopped looking like I had spilt a can of oversized spaghetti on the floor!
I chatted with my Bestie for a decent chunk of the desk tidying process , which was really nice 😊
She told me some exciting news she had received & I was so very pleased for her !
Thus we arrived at the key point if todays story, ASD Pre-assessment appointment 1.
The lass I’m dealing with at this stage ,Abbie, was very nice to deal with & put me at my ease, event though I was initially deeply uncomfortable with the whole idea of the video call freaked me out no end!
The hour long call seemed to take for ever , but it was finally over & the stage is set for next weeks session.
This evening has been taken up with trying to catch up on Mastodon, a near impossible task this late in the day when I have to be in bed & asleep by 10pm at the latest.
Final Thoughts:
I’m still recovering from the discovery that, for whatever reason, my Dad appears to know sod all about me. It’s gonna be a slow process to come to terms with this I think.
It always brightens my day when folks I know get good & unexpected news , for it to be my Bestie was just the icing on the cake! 😊
My ‘official’ journey to a diagnosis has begun properly today, it is both a pleasing & a daunting realisation!
One of the questions was “What do you want out of this ?” ultimately my answer was I’m not sure, I have never been well , thus I don’t know what that ‘looks’ like . If it’s even possible !
Mastodonians rock ! Love you guys, even if I can’t keep up with events as much as I would like at the moment!
Thanks to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you ! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
For those of my #ActuallyAutistic comrades who understood that they're autistic later in life, did you find that the realization helped you get your life into a better spot? Or did it make things more complicated?
More specifically, do you find that it drains your energy more than most people? That you can't push yourself as hard as others? Or, put another way, that you need more rest and recovery time than most people?
Almost two years ago, I tried Couch to 5K. I made it to week five, then burned out and stopped because it so thoroughly drained every bit of energy I had.
I remember being so puzzled and confused about it. I remember thinking, what's wrong with me? I'm eating well. I'm eating enough. I'm getting enough sleep. I'm resting on my off days. I'm not extraordinarily out of shape and I was keeping up with the program well enough until the fifth week.
In retrospect, I'm wondering if it was an Autistic energy management problem, and I'm curious about others' experiences with C25K and other physical activity programs.
I was in a weird null space this past weekend. I knew I had things I wanted to get to but just had literally no drive to do much. I did manage a few things but these were in the evening.
Sometimes I think my pattern is that I’m more productive when there are literally no people around that I know of. It’s not that they’re talking to me, but the very prospect of having to expend energy interacting with or avoiding them switches my drive off.
@brainpilgrim YES! Often even the anticipation of an interruption causes me not to even want to begin deep thought or focus on something, because I know I won’t get to finish. So I don’t start. I know I do this and it’s still aggravating! 🤣😥
@actuallyautistic@brainpilgrim@btaroli this is totally resonant to my experience. I always end up in “waiting mode” until these known interruptions pass, then deal with any associated emotional trauma, before I can take stock and determine if I have the wherewithal to undertake the next course of action…