Ok, I might as well go first: I wish I could draw. Not at the level where I could make photorealistic portraits, but I’ve always been envious of those who are able to scetch something together in a few minutes that perfectly captures what they want to convey. Sometimes words aren’t enough to express what I want to say, and for those situations I would love to have a simple drawing do the talking for me.
See a lot of comments here about creative skills like drawing or singing, and I feel a little bit privileged having skill in both and more besides, on the creative side.
But I can’t really feel good about it, because I have serious problems with math and strict, rule-based stuff.
I really wish I was more logical and structured. I also lack a lot in the department of executive function, being so chaotic and creative. I am really bad at most everything that would actually get me a decent wage. The creative skills are worth nothing (in the sense of getting paid) if you can’t manage to stick to deadlines or sell yourself as an employee or a freelancer, and I keep getting into deep trouble due to miscalculating and misestimating my budgets, timespans, conceptualizing bigger picture when I am thrown into doing small picture stuff, or seeing the small pictures when I’m working with the big picture.
But it’s pretty interesting and fun seeing these different kind of responses. I guess there’s a little bit of a zero sum game here; if one’s good at something, almost always they’re bad on something else. Seems obvious, but somehow I’ve never thought about that.
I think this response is great, because, while I’m on the other side of the fence (theoretical chemist that sucks at anything artistry related) I think it’s a common misconception that math/science/engineering isn’t creative.
I find that misconception both with people struggling to learn it, and often with people teaching it. The reason I bring it up is that, in my experience, the “hard” sciences become both more fun and easy to learn, and more easy to teach, when creativity is encouraged. For my own part, I’m wildly chaotic in the way I solve problems, and my notes are typically a jumbled mess of drawings and scribbles. For my students part, I’ve seen stuff loosen for a lot of people when they’re encouraged to just let their thoughts flow out on their paper, rather than thinking everything through five times first.
By all means: There’s a difference between math and art, but I think a lot of maths teachers and students could have a better time if they allowed themselves to think more artistically, especially those that are well inclined to it.
Change your mindset. Decide to put more effort into your personal life than you do work. Don't burn all your fuel for a workplace that doesn't care if you live or die.
I’m actually working on switching to a different team where I won’t have to manage anyone else. I’m hoping that fixes some of it because a lot of the people I’m in charge of require a lot of baby sitting and my team is 24/7. Im already trying to lower the amount of effort I put in but if I do much less it makes things worse for my coworkers. I don’t really care about the company beyond not getting fired but I do not want to create problems for my coworkers.
Sometimes you have to let people struggle. Managing people means delegating tasks. When I was training to be a McDonald's shift manger in my early 20's one of the training videos said that you should run a shift with your hands in your pockets. What they meant was that you needed to shift your mindset from being a crew member to a manger. You will never get any of your own work done because you will be focused on helping the other crew members with their tasks rather than focusing on the big picture.
I do understand that. The problem is that my boss doesn’t and when my team fails to deliver something I’m answerable for it. On top of that the company as a whole makes it a pain in the ass to replace people if I fire them so it takes months to get someone new up to speed. It’s a no win situation which is why I’m so stressed out all the time.
You just need to manage your bosses expectations better. If they say they want it done by the end of the week, then you need to tell them that it's not possible and you can get it done by the end of the month.
The expectations are based off known metrics of what we can accomplish based off years of data. The high performers on my team consistently double the output that is expected of them while also handling escalation of more difficult issues. I can’t just tell them to lower their expectations because the only thing that’s changed is the people doing the work.
you know its not the work stress for me. I can leave that at the door. Its the transition from work stress to home stress that is the real issue and honestly its much harder to leave home stress at the door.
thanks. its medical issues my wife has had starting over a decade ago so unfortunately thats not going to happen. It would help if I lived in a first world country but I live in the US. Its the old it is what it is thing. again though I appreciate the sentiment.
All kinds of things really although mostly they’re on my list to learn so I’ll have them one day. Tatting might be my main one for 2024.
(Edit: Forgot the “why”. Mostly because it’s come up twice lately here on Lemmy and I feel left out while other people are making pretty lace)
I do wish I could learn to draw a bit better, to play the piano, and to speak multiple languages. But realistically I don’t have that kind of time so have to go with things that are quicker to pick up!
Russian actually isn’t that bad. It takes time, but I’ve been learning it because my gf is fluent. She calls it an unga-bunga language because literal word-by-word translation sounds like caveman-speak lol
French is considered just about as hard as Spanish, maybe a little harder on the phonetics. German is harder than French or Spanish. Russian is harder than German/French/Spanish, but Japanese would be significantly harder than Russian.
Other than ALL, Spanish would be very useful. Japanese so I can watch Anime and not miss half of it because I’m reading subtitles. French so I can cuss at you and sound like I’m quoting a love song. German so I can quote you a love song and sound like I’m cussing at you. And Chinese (mandarin?) because that has a lot of business opportunity.
This is my answer also. I wish I was multi-lingual.
I’m regularly on calls with people for whom English is not their primary language. Almost without fail they apologize for their poor English. I regularly tell those people, “please don’t apologize, you do me that courtesy of communicating with me in my native tongue. I am completely unable to reciprocate that courtesy.”
That’s the problem with native lingua franca speakers. They don’t have a foreign language that they really have to learn.
If you don’t speak English people are mostly limited to their own country. German is worthless in France. So we all need to learn English, while you don’t have a lot of benefit of actually learning other languages.
To show my point: My team at work is spread over most of Europe. We don’t have an English native speaker in the team and there are maybe a small handful of them in the whole company. Still, we all speak English at work, because it’s the only language everyone knows.
Look into Comprehensible Input. Dreaming Spanish is a great channel/site.
It’s really not difficult to do per se, it just takes a LOT of time. 1500+ hours. But if you can replace the time you spend watching YouTube videos and doomscrolling, you’ll get there eventually. Especially once you reach the point of understanding media in the language you’re learning. You can then go mindlessly watch YouTube again… but in that language lmao.
Check out this playlist for an explanation of the method (turn on subtitles) youtube.com/playlist?list=PLlpPf-YgbU7GrtxQ9yde-J… , TL;DW don’t study the language. Don’t do grammar/vocab by rote. Literally just listen to a crap ton of the language. You will learn grammar/vocab naturally with repetition in context. But you must listen/watch at a level you can understand. That starts with content with a lot of hand gestures and simple stories, where maybe you don’t understand the words but you understand the meaning by the rest of the context. After a hundred hours or so you can move on to content with less context clues, and after maybe 400-600 hours start with media meant for native speakers.
Juggling. I want to be able to juggle. Have tried so many times and failed so many times. No good reason, I just really want to be able to do it.
I’m quite willing to draw badly and sing badly, find those enjoyable even without talent. They seem like human things everyone does, and if I practice they get better. But for whatever reason, I am so jealous of those with reflexes that let them snatch balls out of the air, and haven’t been able to learn this. When I practice I don’t get better and it’s frustrating.
Being able to do stuff without having to mentally prepare for days/weeks/months and then abandon it because it’s just too much. I want to travel more, go on multi-day bike tours, start a business, whatever. It’s almost impossible for me because I worry too much about every single detail that could happen.
Focus on reading a book.
I can do it but I have to be in the mood. I wish it were all the time but it’s more like once a month. I’m trying to wean myself away from screens and be more mindful about spending more than a few minutes on a task. It’s a lifestyle change and a struggle.
Also; spelling, typing, and writing in print and cursive. I always type and write letters out of order.
I used to work with a guy who could draw. He would absentmindedly create masterpieces with a sharpie and a dirty sheet of cardboard while waiting on a machine to finish. He said the only reason he can do it is because he practiced.
Every cool thing you see someone do, they’re only capable of it because they kept trying every day.
I wish I could speak Spanish fluently. Formal, immersion, and independent study got me nowhere. I REALLY want to go to Mexico City to see ruins and it would be helpful if I could carry a conversation.
Learning to say no. Many times or not to say all my life I have always tried to get along with everyone, and I always say “Yes” to everything, committing myself to things I really don’t want just because I don’t know how to say no.
I have the opposite problem as you, I wish I was more able to verbally express myself without becoming lost in the options during an open conversation, an issue I’ve always had to deal with.
There is a critical difference between talent and skill. Talent is naturally understanding and being good at something quickly. Skill is something that can be acquired and honed to perfection regardless of talent.
If you want to learn a new skill, just start doing it and stop being afraid of failing at it. In fact, the failures and fuck ups are the single greatest mechanisms by which your skills will improve.
Home Depot rents out gas-less mig welders surprisingly cheap. You could spend a fun 3-4 hours noodling around trying simple welding of angle iron pieces!
I bet you could find a class on it somewhere. Trade school or adult edu or even a local car club might have occasional offerings. This one is on my list too.
I could go to a community college around me (I know they teach it), but scheduling it around work might take some work. You know, I think I might actually look and see if they have an occasional weekend course. I don't have to be a professional welder, just good enough.
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